CAPSULE: DREAM TEAM (2024)

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Dream Team is currently available for VOD rental or purchase.

DIRECTED BY: Whitney Horn, Lev Kalman

FEATURING: Alex Zhang Hungtai, Esther Garrel, Fariha Róisín, Isabelle Barbier, Minh T Mia

PLOT: Interpol agents Chase National and No St. Aubergine are on the case, investigating a murderous coral conspiracy.

COMMENTS: Whoever edited Dream Team deserves a prize. It’s slippery, smooth, relaxing—and looks gooood. Quick research tells me that none other than Horn and Kalman (also the directors, producers, cinematographers, &c.) were responsible. So there’s that. There’s also the rest of the Dream Team phenomenon, which I’m having difficulty putting into words. Please allow me a quick break for a word from our sponsors…

… which is in keeping with the structure (?) punctuating the film. Dream Team is broken into seven episodes, beginning with “Asses to Ashes” and wrapping up with an incongruous finale on the seventh episode, “Ashes to Asses.” The episodes’ cheeky titles (others include “Doppelgängbang” and “the Biggest Organ”) are the first of two clear statements of intent: Horn and Kalman are laughing with us at themselves—or presumably that’s the hope. The second clear statement of intent, illuminated only halfway through and then after the fact, is they’re both really interested in coral. Upwards of a fifth of the movie is dedicated to what is effectively a lecture on that super-organism, delivered by alt-kinky Doctor Beef, often in a mesh top or bathing suit. Horn and Kalman also explore other pet interests, including a paired gymnastics routine by Interpol tech girls K and Venice, not to forget a dive into the philosophical nature of philosophy and experimentation, and ending on an oenophilic note with a wine tasting for a “coed/co-op” basketball team.

As scribbled by Dr. Peniris, truth is required for beauty, so permit me to strive for that beauty within this humble review: I got rather distracted around two-thirds through, and do believe I lost the thread of the narrative. For this I apologize, but wish to place some of the blame on the movie itself. I survived, wholly focused, both Damnation and Nostalghia, so I feel this dereliction of duty wasn’t for lack of practice. But Horn and Kalman have made a very dreamy movie, nostalgic for a period that never quite existed in the manner presented. And this is fine: there’s nothing wrong with a post-post-modern reinvention via dream-cycle of a post-modern, mid-ironic pastel-fused quarter-century-ago remembrance—except for how many hyphens are required to describe it.

Dream Team is currently in limited release in New York and Los Angeles and will presumably show up on VOD in the near future. We’ll let you know.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAY:

“… a meandering coral conspiracy that never gets weird enough to justify its lack of focus… more of an exercise in form than story, and the filmmakers almost seem determined to recreate the dissociative effects of zoning out to endless episodes of mediocre cable TV in the middle of the night. The real artistic product might not be the movie itself, but the places that your mind takes you as it lulls you into a trance.”–Indiewire (contemporaneous)

49*. BEAU IS AFRAID (2023)

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Recommended

“It’s like a Jewish ‘Lord of the Rings,’ but he’s just going to his mom’s house.”― Ari Aster

DIRECTED BY: Ari Aster

FEATURING: Joaquin Phoenix, Patti LuPone, Amy Ryan, Nathan Lane, Parker Posey, Armen Nahapetian

PLOT: On the anniversary of his father’s death, Beau Wasserman misses his flight to visit his mother; his guilt is magnified by his mother’s surprise death by falling chandelier. He attempts to attend the funeral (to be held immediately in accordance with Jewish tradition), but he is waylaid crime in his anarchic neighborhood, an accident that leaves him in the care of a couple who seem to be using him to replace their dead son, and a wandering theater troupe that spurs thoughts of another possible life. When he finally arrives at his mother’s house, he is surprised by both the appearance of a lost flame from his youth and by a revelation about his mother’s fate that calls into question every aspect of his existence.

Still from beau is afriad (2023)

BACKGROUND:

  • Following his successes in the horror genre with Hereditary and Midsommar, Aster determined that his next project would be a comedy. This is that film.
  • The feature is massively expanded from a short Aster made in 2011.
  • Among Aster’s descriptions of the picture: a “nightmare comedy,” a “Freudian Odyssey,” and “if you pumped a 10-year-old full of Zoloft, and [had] him get your groceries.” Co-star Lane called it “the Jewish Everything Everywhere All at Once.”
  • The animation was created by Cristobal Leon and Joaquin Cociña, whose work Aster discovered in their Apocryphally-enshrined film The Wolf House.
  • The logo for Mona’s corporation appears among the vanity production cards at the start of the movie. Some have suggested this means she is controlling the very film you are watching.
  • Winner of two 2023 Weirdcademy Awards, including Weirdest Picture and Weirdest Scene for what we chose to call “Phallic Attic.” Phoenix also grabbed a nomination for Weirdest Actor.

INDELIBLE IMAGE: Well, this site’s readers didn’t declare it the year’s weirdest movie for nothing. When Beau’s mother coerces him into her attic, he is confronted with three terrifying visions: an emaciated creature chained in the dark who might be a lost twin or an alternate version of himself, the homicidal mercenary who has been chasing him across the country, and (most shockingly) enormous, grotesque monolithic male genitals that throb and scream and kill like the brain bug in Starship Troopers. Beau has been emotionally neutered his whole life, and this is the moment that suggests where his lost manhood may have been this whole time.

TWO WEIRD THINGS: Crossing Hell Street; phallic attic

WHAT MAKES IT WEIRD: Beau’s very existence is a nightmare, from the moment that he is born with a wail-inducing smack, and even dating back to the moment of conception that stopped his father’s weak heart. What unspools here is three hours of the intense and unrelenting discomfort that Beau endures just by virtue of being alive. He manages to be both the most luckless man who ever lived and a person who is thoroughly incapable of coping with misfortune. Aster concocts the most elaborate Jewish-mother joke ever told, and he never relents in demonstrating just how awful things can get, and how they can still manage to get worse.

Original trailer for Beau is Afraid (2023)

COMMENTS: Beau Wasserman’s life is governed by a few simple Continue reading 49*. BEAU IS AFRAID (2023)

POD 366, EP. 94: ALL THE WEIRD MOVIES BE OURS, 2

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Quick links/Discussed in this episode:

“All the Haunts Be Ours: A Compendium of Folk Horror, Vol. 2”: Another astounding collection of rarities, including two Canonically Weird movies in the set: the surreal stop-motion fairy tale Blood Tea and Red String (2006) and the bleak Estonian pagan fable November (2017)Pre-order All the Haunts Be Ours: A Compendium of Folk Horror, Vol. 2.”

Dream Team (2024): A spoof of softcore cable TV erotica of the 1990s, with a plot involving psychic coral. The promotional material proudly proclaims it is “beautifully weird,” I Saw the TV Glow‘s is a producer, and it debuts at NYC’s Metrograph this week (distribution plans past that are unclear at this time).  Dream Team official site.

Ghost Cat Anzu (2024): Read Giles Edwards’ Apocrypha Candidate review. From GKids, so this kid-friendly, Spirited Away-adjacent anime fantasy will be getting decent theatrical distribution. Ghost Cat Anzu U.S. distributor site.

“Golden Harvest Volume 1: Supernatural Shockers”: A misleadingly titled box set from Shout! Factory: with Hong Kong New Wave features Sex and Zen; Erotic Ghost Story I, II, & III; Dr. Vampire; and Robotrix, this should have been titled “Sexy Supernatural Shockers.”  All are Cat III features full of nudity and violence, including Sex and Zen‘s infamous “organ” transplant scene. Buy “Golden Harvest Volume 1: Supernatural Shockers.”

Häxan (1922): Read the Canonically Weird review! Radiance out-criterions the with this lavish limited edition of the witchcraft documentary that contains four different cuts of the film in addition to its many other extras. The Amazon listing says that it is an all-region Blu-ray.  Buy Häxan.

Maniac (1934): Read the Canonically Weird entry for Maniac! In conjunction with Something Weird, Kino releases the maniacal 1934 shocker with a commentary track and some rare shorts as “Forbidden Fruit: The Golden Age of the Exploitation Picture Vol. 17.” The cats eat the rats, the rats eat the cats, and you get the Blu-ray. Buy Maniac.

Megalopolis (2024): Read Gregory J. Smalley, Giles Edwards, and El Rob Hubbard’s Apocrypha Candidate review. We’ve talked for a year now about Francis Ford Coppola‘s glorious folly, and now it’s rentable (at premium pricing) on VOD for those who missed it in theaters. We also have a Pod 366 episode (with featured extra Nadia Robertson) almost entirely dedicated to this one. Rent Megalopolis.

Pedro Páramo (2024): Adaptation of a classical magical realist novel about a dusty Mexican town where the living may be the dead, this is the directing debut of award-winning cinematographer Rodrigo Prieto. Pedro Páramo on Netflix.

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE:

Next week’s guests on Pod 366 will be Bradley Kornish and Dan Pullen of Movies from Hell (a reciprocal appearance after Giles and Greg guested on their podcast back in early October.) In written reviews, Shane Wilson goes outside the reader-suggestion queue for a second look at Beau Is Afraid (you can probably guess what that means); Giles Edwards addresses the dreaminess of Dream Team (see above); and Gregory J. Smalley plans to knock our both a new release and a reader suggestion with the Pharrell Williams Lego autobiography Piece by Piece. Onward and weirdward!

CAPSULE: NUDE TUESDAY (2022)

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DIRECTED BY: Armagan Ballantyne

FEATURING: Jackie van Beek, , , Ian Zaro

PLOT: A middle-aged European couple goes to a New Age sex resort in an attempt to rekindle their passion.

Still from Nude Tuesday (2022)

COMMENTS: Although it’s a romantic comedy, Nude Tuesday is also, more importantly, an experimental film. Unfortunately, in this case, the experiment amounts to nothing more than a gimmick. The idea is that the actors rehearsed the script in English and then, when it came time to turn the cameras on, delivered the lines in vaguely Scandinavian-sounding gibberish. Two sets of writers who were unfamiliar with the original script then watched the film and provided subtitles. (The one created by Julia Davis is the default track in the US region; one presumes the alternate track from Ronny Chieng and Cecilia Paquola is also available on the Blu-ray, although I can’t find confirmation).

Woody Allen once infamously re-dubbed a Japanese spy film to change the story to the search for an egg salad recipe. But it quickly becomes apparent that Nude Tuesday‘s constrained scenario doesn’t lend itself to such a dramatic reinvention, and nor will the writer try for the sort of meta-comedy (e.g. a narrator recapping the plot, fourth-wall break addresses to the audience) that Allen occasionally fell back on to liven things up. Without that, the result is that there is almost literally no line the dubber can write that couldn’t have been written in the usual way. In creating the new dialogue, Davis faces a lot of constraints: who’s in the scene, the length of the spoken lines, contextual requirements (is the character naked? Bleeding? Chasing a goat?) This means that the dialogue is always a slave to the demands of the scene as it’s been set up, and Davis has little actual freedom besides word choice. (She can, for example, make a preening Bjorn say the absurd line “I’m an eagle pimp with a bit of a grudge,”  though a regular scriptwriter could have inserted that line anyway). Every reaction is so strictly dictated by the demands of the dialogueless script and the actor’s performances that there’s almost no margin for surprise; I can only think of one gag Davis was able to set up that wasn’t strictly dictated by the situation (a joke regarding the bean supermarket aisle). To be fair, there’s also the fact that the finale is constructed somewhat ambiguously, so that there could be multiple outcomes (I wasn’t overly fond of the one chosen here.)

So, while it may have been a stimulating writing exercise for the dubbers, there’s no possible payoff for the audience. What we’re left with is an offbeat-yet-predictable sex comedy. The main attraction is Clemens, playing yet another narcissistic jerk deserving of a hearty comeuppance. The sex retreat’s rituals can be amusing, with orgasmic breathing exercises, strange loungewear and banana hammocks, lots of awkward overplayed sensuality, and of course, nude Tuesday. And the script throws in a mushroom trip for funsies. But none of it is anything you wouldn’t expect to see in a relatively competent indie sex comedy. It’s a bit like being sold a ticket into something that was promised to be a freaskshow, and passing through the curtain to find one lonely dwarf and a bearded lady who just needs a quick pass-over with an epilady.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAY:

“… one of the best feel-weird, feel-good movies I’ve seen in quite a long time.”–Davy, Cinema Sentries (festival screening)

Nude Tuesday AMAZON EXCLUSIVE [Blu-ray]
  • Amazon Exclusive!
  • Contains an Amazon exclusive postcard.
  • Behind the Scenes of Nude Tuesday

Celebrating the cinematically surreal, bizarre, cult, oddball, fantastique, strange, psychedelic, and the just plain WEIRD!