In just a few hours, the telecast of the Oscars (or, as we refer to them, the “Weirdcademy Awards for squares”) will begin. We are happy to steal the Academy’s thunder by announcing cinema’s weirdest winners of 2023 now.
In the category of “Weirdest Short Film,” our A.I. overlords have officially arrived. The winner is Alex Howard‘s Joe Biden and Trump Eating Spaghetti, but it’s an AI generated nightmare.
In the category of “Weirdest Scene,” the Weirdcademy Award goes to Beau is Afraid for the scene we’ve dubbed “phallic attic.” We can’t show it to you or describe it in detail because it would be a spoiler, but you’ll know it when you see it (enough of you certainly knew of it to make it the winner). Here is Beau’s reaction to the scene:
In the category of “Weirdest Actress,” the Award goes to Poor Things‘ Emma Stone for her portrayal of fetus-brained Bella Baxter. Should Stone also take home the Oscar, as Michelle Yeoh did last year, this will be the second year in a row (and the third time ever) that the Academy and the Weirdcademy have shared the Actress award. This gives us some pause.
In a bit of an upset, Willem Dafoe wins his second “Weirdest Actor” award for his role as God, the scar-faced, bubble-burping mad scientist in Poor Things.
And finally, the award for Weirdest Picture of 2022 goes to… drum roll… Beau Is Afraid!
Thanks to all voting members of the Weirdcademy, and see you again next year!
You can browse previous years’ winners here.