AND THE WINNERS OF THE 10TH ANNUAL WEIRDCADEMY AWARDS ARE…

In just a few hours, the telecast of the Oscars (or, as we refer to them, the “Weirdcademy Awards for squares”) will begin. We are happy to steal the Academy’s thunder by announcing cinema’s weirdest winners of 2019 now.

In the category of “Weirdest Short Film,” the winner is for “Future Beach.”

In the category of “Weirdest Scene,” the Weirdcademy Award goes to The Lighthouse, for the final shot. Those who have seen it know that the scene elicited a lot of loud “WTF”s from the audience—even from those with a background in classical mythology. So we won’t spoil it for those who have yet to see the film. (The still below comes from the second-to-last-scene.)

The Lighthouse Weirdest Scene of 2019

In the category of “Weirdest Actress,” the Award goes to Aleksandra Cwen (below, left) in Hagazussa, as the creepy gal on the mountain who keeps mom’s skull on the mantle and masturbates around goats.

Aleksandra Cwen Weirdest Actress 2019 for Hagasuzza

In the category of “Weirdest Actor,” the Award goes to , in The Lighthouse, for introducing himself with a fart and for starting his monologues with “Hark, Triton!”

https://youtu.be/C8yeo32thiI

And finally, the award for Weirdest Picture of 2019 goes to… drum roll… The Lighthouse, in a cakewalk.

Thanks to all voting members of the Weirdcademy, and see you again next year!

WEIRD HORIZON FOR THE WEEK OF 2/7/2020

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Our weekly look at what’s weird in theaters, on hot-off-the-presses DVDs and Blu-rays (and hot off the server VODs), and on more distant horizons…

Trailers of new release movies are generally available at the official site links.

IN THEATERS (LIMITED RELEASE):

Come to Daddy (2019): Read Giles Edwards’ review. This father and son reunion story is merely quirky up until “a plot spasm of strange violence brought the weird levels up to floodgate-breaking point.” No official site found, but director Ant Timpson posts info about the film on his Facebook page.

Horse Girl (2020): A mentally ill loner (Alison Brie) loses her grip as surreal dreams intrude on her waking life. Reviews are poor, but one bourgeois critic complained that it “gets weird for no good reason,” which sounds promising to us. In select theaters and debuting simultaneously on Netflix.

Pandora and the Flying Dutchman (1951): The Flying Dutchman (James Mason) is doomed to sail the seas until he finds a woman willing to die for him; will femme fatale nightclub singer Pandora (Ava Gardner) be the one? This strange film—Surrealist Man Ray was on set as a photographer, and The New York Times said it has a “feverish, dreamlike quality“—is being re-released this week in a new 4K restoration. It appears to be playing at the Quad in NYC (other venues unknown), but will probably see another home video release soon.

NEW ON HOME VIDEO:

Brain Damage (1988): Read James Phillip’s “List Candidate” review. The Aylmer, a phallic creature who inserts a euphoric psychedelic directly into its (un)lucky host’s brain stem, comes to Blu-ray for the first time, accompanied by a horde of special features, courtesy of Arrow. Buy Brain Damage.

Evil Ed (1995): Read Pete Trbovich’s review. Another Arrow release; this splatter spoof was released on Blu-ray in 2017 in a lavish 3-disc set, but this single disc still has plenty of features and is a more affordable option. Buy Evil Ed.

CERTIFIED WEIRD (AND OTHER) REPERTORY SCREENINGS:

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975). We’ll only list irregularly scheduled one-time screenings of this audience-participation classic below. You can use this page to find a regular weekly screening near you.

El Topo (1970) / The Holy Mountain (1973) / Fando y Lis (1968) in the U.K. – We don’t generally list screenings outside of North America, but since we can provide our newly Brexited friends with a single link (courtesy of Arrow Video) to cover all of these re-releases, why not? We won’t be doing this every week, so bookmark it. This page details screenings of these three films as they are released all over England, Ireland, Scotland and Wales, from the current date through April. THE ALEJANDRO JODOROWSKY TRIPTYCH.

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE: First up next week, we’ll announce the winners of this year’s Weirdcademy Awards on Sunday (before Hollywood even starts its Most Conventional Picture awards ceremonies). There is still plenty of time to vote (here for features, here for shorts). Even though is currently cleaning up in every category it was nominated in, the Weirdest Short race is still competitive, and the Weirdest Actress vote is, at the time of this writing, tied.

After the 2019 awards go into the books, it’s back to the grind as Pete Trbovich looks at the Conan the Barbarian/Mad Max mashup She (1984), Giles Edwards clears out another marginal reader request from the suggestion queue as he considers whether Earth Girls Are Easy should be apocryphized, and G. Smalley reports on the “new” short, “What Did Jack Do?” Onward and weirdward!

What are you looking forward to? If you have any weird movie leads that we have overlooked, feel free to leave them in the COMMENTS section.

CAPSULE: GODZILLA VS. HEDORAH (1971) AND THE “GODZILLA: THE SHOWA-ERA FILMS, 1954–1975” BOX SET

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DIRECTED BY: Yoshimitsu Banno

FEATURING: Akira Yamauchi, Toshie Kimura, Hiroyuki Kawase, Toshio Shiba, Keiko Mari

PLOT: Hedorah, a monster created from earth’s excessive pollution, wreaks havoc on Japan.

Still from Godzilla vs. Hedorah (1971)
COMMENTS: “Hedorah is a monster of our own making.” In the intro we see Hedorah rise from some sludgy gloop floating in the ocean. The creature attacks freighters and factories and at the same time inhales the pollution they emit to grow larger and more powerful. A young boy and his marine biologist father are on the case, and soon discover the origins of the creature and why and how it is evolving.

The child is the film’s protagonist. He seems to have a connection with Godzilla. He knows Godzilla is coming before he appears. Like the original 1954 Godzilla, Godzilla vs. Hedorah comes with a strong message about the harm man can do: Godzilla was awoken by hydrogen bomb tests, Hedorah is an alien being made massive and powerful by pollution.

At this point in the Godzilla series, the King of the Monsters has been both an enemy of mankind, and sometimes somewhat of a hero. At the story’s climax walls of electricity are set up in hopes of frying Hedorah. When the generator fails, Godzilla lends man a hand with his breath. As a child, I loved Godzilla as the hero; it’s something I’ve never grown out of.

There is, of course, also a final battle between the two creatures. If you come to Godzilla flicks for the creature fights, you will be rather disappointed here. This Godzilla reminds me a little of one of the Three Stooges putting on goofy moves, shrugging and shuffling about. And Godzilla flying through the air?! What was that? I suppose Hedorah would be a slippery sucker to grab at, being a pollution monster. He starts out looking like a giant sperm, but evolves into a flying saucer shape, and eventually takes an upright form. Hedorah is not one of Toho’s more effective monsters, visually, but he does more damage than most.

Godzilla vs. Hedorah is a unique entry among the Godzilla Showa era films. It is the only film in the series that I am aware of that includes psychedelic imagery and animated sequences. These elements are unusual for Godzilla, but there is nothing particularly weird about them for a film from the late 1960s or early 1970s.

Godzilla vs. Hedorah has its goofy moments, but at times is actually quite grim. The poisonous toxin emitted by Hedorah kills instantly and the film has a significant body count . The harsh message of the animated sequences gives the pleasing and colorful animation a disturbing quality. I loved the addition of animation.  I also loved the attractive young couple they added in as secondary characters. All the Continue reading CAPSULE: GODZILLA VS. HEDORAH (1971) AND THE “GODZILLA: THE SHOWA-ERA FILMS, 1954–1975” BOX SET

CAPSULE: THE MACHINE GIRL (2008)

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Kataude Mashin Gâru

DIRECTED BY:

FEATURING: Minase Yashiro, , Honoka, Nobuhiro Nishihara,  Kentaro Shimazu

PLOT: Yakuza kill a schoolgirl’s brother and lop off her arm, but a friendly mechanic affixes a Gatling gun to her stump and she goes on a bloodbath of revenge.

Still from The Machine Girl (2008)

COMMENTS: The term “,” as used on this site, refers to a subgenre of Japanese horror movies, beginning with Meatball Machine in 2005, that were equally influenced by the mechanical body horror of Tetsuo: The Iron Man and the over-the-top comic violence of The Gore Gore Girls-era . Few movies could be more exemplary of this mix than ‘s junkyard bloodletter about a schoolgirl with a machine-gun arm hunting down the brutal ninja-yakuza gang that killed her brother.

The plot is vengeance-standard boilerplate; the movie really only cares about its gore set pieces (to an extent, it also cares about its action set pieces, but mainly because they set up big gory finishes). Iguchi is nothing if not creative in coming up with new ways to mutilate the human body: Machine Girl gives you finger sushi, a tempura arm, people halved from head to crotch, a pair of guys who swap half their faces, and for a finale, a sadistic yakuza matron who warns Machine Girl, “I’m wearing a special bra…”

Even in service of the absurd, the practical effects here are good to excellent; the blood spurts may be watery and improbably voluminous, but the prosthetic heads and other body parts can be surprisingly realistic. The computer aided effects, on the other hand, are deployed too casually: the use of green screen is sometimes obvious, some effects look pixelated, and the bullet flashes are overdone and silly-looking. There are also frequent blood spatters on the camera lens, which is a fourth-wall-breaking pet peeve of mine.

It’s noteworthy that most of the main characters—both heroes and the final boss—are females who drive the action and triumph over the males. (All those schoolgirl upskirt fetish shots take away from the feminist vibe a bit, though). The three main actresses all do well, considering the low bar. In her film debut, gravure idol Minase Yashiro shows decent athleticism that makes her a plausible action lead. Honoka, an actress with mostly adult credits, has wicked fun playing a bad girl who keeps her bra on for a change. Most impressive of all is Asami, previously known mostly for her pink films, who, when not kicking ninja ass, forgets that she’s in a trashy B-movie and gives her emotional all grieving for her slain son (who must be about eight years younger than her). The extra effort is appreciated. The one knock against the two heroines is that they enjoy torturing a captured thug way too much, surrendering their moral authority. (This may seem like a stupid complaint in a movie about a girl with a machine gun arm, but it’s still a narrative slip-up, since Machine Girl had previously been depicted as a righteous avenger).

The makeup and effects here were done by , who appears in the promotional material on almost equal billing with Iguchi. He would go on to surpass Iguchi as a director, and in fact has proven the most talented of all the directors associated with Japan’s splatterpunks.

This review is based on Tokyo Shock’s two-disc “The Machine Girl: Jacked! The Definitive Decade One Deluxe Edition.” The title makes it sound like an impressive release, until you realize it’s a DVD-on-demand[efn_note]A release of the same name comes on one Blu-ray, but the one available consumer review of that disc suggests that the Blu, while more expensive, does not include the special features found on disc 2 of the DVD set. The same reviewer claims that the visual quality of the Blu is noticeably better than previous Tokyo Shock releases, an improvement that does not come through on the DVD-R. Buyer beware.[/efn_note], and the sometimes fuzzy presentation is nothing like a remastered print. This edition also fails to include the spin-off short “Shyness Machine Girl,” which had been included in previous releases; its absence makes it hard to call this a truly “definitive” release. What the set does deliver are two behind-the-scenes featurettes, one running ten minutes and the other twenty (with some of the footage overlapping between the two); a twelve minute segment devoted to the effects; action scene rehearsals; an older group interview (in which Nishimura discusses his then yet-to-be-released Tokyo Gore Police); and several often amusing sets of footage from screenings and Q&As with cast and crew (including one where Iguchi and Nishimura introduce the film together wearing sumo loincloths). Altogether, the supplements run almost as long as the movie itself. The release also sports an English dubbed track. Altogether, it’s an heavily hyped package that promises more than it delivers—much like the movie itself.

WHAT THE CRITICS SAY:

“The story is absolutely ridiculous, of course… There’s always some bit of extra craziness going on in the corners…”–Jay Seaver, Efilm Critic (contemporaneous)

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