In just a few hours, the telecast of the Oscars (or, as we refer to them, the “Weirdcademy Awards for squares”) will begin. We are happy to steal the Academy’s Thunder by announcing cinema’s weirdest winners of 2018 now.

In the category of “Weirdest Short Film,” the winner is u m a m i for “Interface | Episode 11 | Revelation.”

In the category of “Weirdest Scene,” the Weirdcademy Award goes to Mandy for the “Cheddar Goblin,” a faux-1980s spokesmonster spotted vomiting gooey pasta onto appreciative tykes in the in-film commercial espied by protagonist Red while grieving over the death of his beloved. (Director Panos Cosmatos commissioned Casper Kelly of “Too Many Cooks” fame to direct the “Cheddar Goblin” advert).

In the category of “Weirdest Actress,” the Award goes to Tilda Swinton in Suspiria (2018). It’s the best stunt casting of 2018—for reasons we can’t reveal in case you haven’t seen the movie yet—except to say that she almost loses her head, and explodes, and gets dementia.

In the category of “Weirdest Actor,” the Award goes to Nicolas Cage in Mandy, in a romp, for another of the wonderfully subtle and restrained performances that have become his hallmark, this time as a vengeful lumberjack who hunts zombie bikers and hippie cultists with a crossbow, an axe he forged himself, and a chainsaw.

And finally, the award for Weirdest Picture of 2017 goes to… durm roll… Mandy, the trippiest psychedelic midnight movie of 2018 (and arguably of the decade).

Thanks to all members of the Weirdcademy, and see you again next year!