CONTEST: COME UP WITH “THREE WEIRD THINGS,” WIN A “THE PERFECT HUSBAND” BLU-RAY

Long-time readers of this site may have noticed that the format for our Certified Weird entries has changed slightly over the years. Starting with entry 201 (Blue Velvet, published May 6, 2015) we began adding a heading called “THREE WEIRD THINGS” to the write-ups (for the inaugural entry, those three weird things were “dream of the robins,” “candy-colored clown,” and “dead man standing”).

Since we started this category relatively late in the site’s history, there are still 200 movies on the List without a “three weird things” entry. Your challenge, should you chose to accept it, will be to compose a “three weird things” entry for one of the Certified Weird movies that does not yet have one. If you’re looking for a list of all the movies meeting that criterion, you can start here and use the navigation bar at the bottom to go forward (all entries on pages 6 to 25 of that list qualify). Here are just a few suggestions for popular movies without a “three weird things” entry yet: Gummo, The Holy Mountain, Begotten, Donnie Darko, Naked Lunch, Enter the Void, Evil Dead II, and Eraserhead.

The submission we judge to be best will win a factory-sealed Blu-ray of the 2014 horror filmThe Perfect Husband (see description below). As a bonus, the winning submission will also be added to the official review for the movie they chose, with a note identifying the winner by his or her chosen handle.

“Three Weird Things” entries should be short phrases (2-4 words each, rarely more). The ideal entry will identify the three legitimately weirdest elements of the chosen film in a way that’s clever, but without being too “jokey.” Also, the submission should not be vulgar and should not give away crucial plot points or spoilers.

The contest winner will be chosen by 366 Weird Movies and must furnish a U.S. address for prize delivery. Contest open to residents of the U.S. only.  By making a submission in the contest, you agree to allow us to publish your contribution with no further compensation. Contest closes Sunday, Aug. 14, at midnight and the winner will be announced on Monday, Aug. 15. Enter by making a comment on this post. Multiple entries for different films are acceptable.

ABOUT THE PRIZE:

The Perfect HusbandA Blu-ray of The Perfect Husband has been provided by Artsploitation Films (distributors of the Certified Weird Der Samurai).

From the boxcover: “This unsettling psychological horror film is a bloody delight. A couple try to recover from a family trauma by spending a weekend in a cottage in the woods but what was supposed to be a romantic weekend suddenly turns into a deadly nightmare as seething suspicions, maddening paranoia and blind rage explodes around them.”

The Flick Fanatic’s Companion calls it “Blood and violent… terrifying and suspenseful… this is a great movie!”

Written and directed by Lucas Pavetto. Starring Gabriella Wright (“The Tudors”) and Bret Roberts. Bonus features: “Il Marito Perfectto (short film), The Perfect Husband behind-the-scenes, and Artsploitation film trailers.

22 thoughts on “CONTEST: COME UP WITH “THREE WEIRD THINGS,” WIN A “THE PERFECT HUSBAND” BLU-RAY”

  1. Just a few random ones from the entries I’ve seen…

    Lisztomania: Charlie Chaplin sendup, ceramic castration, Frankenthor.

    The Swimmer: Existential highway wandering, nudist elitism, sudden horse race.

    The 5000 Fingers of Dr T: Imaginary fishing bonding, ladders to nowhere, junk-based atomic science.

    I’m a Cyborg But That’s OK: High stakes rice eating, dissertations on cyborg sin, make-believe surgery.

    Admittedly, several of these submissions don’t work with the absolute weirdest elements of the film (my ideal Dr T three weird things would be more like “hypnotic whammy battle, underground musical cacophany, executioner elevator operator”), but my primary goal here was to highlight those offbeat elements that best described the tonal off-kilterness of the films rather than their most visceral imagery, as I believe doing so tiptoes around plot spoilers while also giving the reader a better idea of what they’re in for than a textual recap of the most in-your-face imagery would at a glance.

  2. Howl’s Moving Castle:
    Bosch steampunk castle, casual bird-warrior transformations, sweating morbidly obese witch

  3. Pink Flamingos (1972):
    egg obsession, mother and son incest, dog crap eating

    Salo (1975): fascism, feces buffet, urination

    Blue Velvet (1986):
    ear in the grass, “In Dreams”, awkward nudity

  4. Taxidermia:

    Competitive speed-eating, do-it-yourself mechanical self-embalming, and a penis that ejaculates fire.

  5. Thanks all! Very good entries. Strangely enough, the winner is in the very first post, from Gargus. And it’s his “alternate” set of choices for The 5,000 Fingers if Dr. T: “hypnotic whammy battle, underground musical cacophany, executioner elevator operator.” Thanks to everyone who participated, maybe we’ll do it again.

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