Next week you can expect to see reviews of the “sick” film Feed (2005) and two opinions on the metaphysical Paul Giamatti comedy Cold Souls (2009).  Other films that may get tackled include Chan-wook Park‘s Thirst (2009), the Coen brothers’ A Serious Man (2009), or Richard Kelly‘s The Box (2009).  2009 is rushing to a close, and we have yet to discover a truly bizarre film released theatrically this year.

We go back to he fetish well for the weirdest search term used to locate the site this week: “riding pony sex napoleon riding cult.”

And the reader-suggested review queue is once again growing faster than we can knock titles off it.  Here’s how it stands now: Greaser’s Palace (substituted for Institute Benjamenta), Waking Life, Survive Style 5+, The Dark Backward, The Short Films of David Lynch, Santa Sangre, Dead Man, Inland Empire, Monday (assuming I can find an English language version), The Abominable Dr. Phibes, Barton Fink, What? (Diary of Forbidden Dreams), Meatball Machine, Xtro, Basket Case, Suicide Club, O Lucky Man!, Trash Humpers (when/if released), Gozu, Tales of Ordinary Madness, The Wayward Cloud, Kwaidan, Six-String Samurai, Andy Warhol’s Trash, Altered States, Memento, Nightmare Before Christmas/Vincent/Frankenweenie, The Science of Sleep, Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind, Gothic, The Attic Expeditions, After Last Season, Getting Any?, Performance, Being John Malkovich, The Apple, and Southland Tales.

A look at what’s weird in theaters, on hot-off-the-presses DVDs, and on more distant horizons…

Trailers of new release movies are generally available on the official site links.

IN THEATERS (LIMITED RELEASE):

Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans: I don’t know how weird it will be, but if you know your movies you’ll immediately see that the concept is totally crazy: the great Werner Herzog remakes Abel Ferrara’s singular, bleak Bad Lieutenant, but as a self-aware action parody, with Nicolas Cage going wild (maybe channeling Klaus Hinski?) as the titular drug-crazed cop.  Even if it wasn’t getting excellent reviews, it would be worth seeing just for the talent mashup involved.   Bad Lieutenant: Port of Call New Orleans official site.

Mr. Sadman: The interesting premise is that one of Saddam Hussein’s body doubles loses his job and moves to Los Angeles immediately before Iraq invades Kuwait in 1990.  The press release describes the impersonator’s journey as a “surreal quest to rediscover the love, adoration and fame he once knew;” we suspect that’s a “small s” surreal, but it sounds offbeat at the very least. Playing Los Angeles this week before heading off to DVD land.   Mr. Sadman official site.

SCREENINGS  (NEW YORK CITY):

I Can See You (2008):  Read our review of this “psychedelic campfire tale.”  Here’s your chance to see one of the weirdest movies of 2008 on a big screen in high definition, along with the 3-D short The Viewer.   Playing at NYU’s Cantor Film Center at 36 East 8th Street tonight only!

The Sun [Solzne] (2005):  It contains at least one crazy dream sequence, but this minimalist biopic about Emperor Horohito’s defeat from Russian director Alexander Sokurov is only a borderline weird pick; it’s still a noteworthy off-the-beaten-path choice for New Yorkers.  Playing at the Film Forum.

NEW ON DVD:

Franklyn (2008):  This weird-sounding film tells two converging stories, one set in modern London and the other in a fantastical Meanwhile City, which is ruled by religious fanatics.  The films fans compare the visual look to a low-budget City of Lost Children.  Another one we’ll need to take a look at down the road. Buy from Amazon.

The Limits of Control (2009): From Jim Jamursch, who brought us the anti-western Dead Man, comes this anti-thriller about a mysterious nameless, assassin in Spain meeting with enigmatic strangers in pursuit of an unknown mission. Buy from Amazon.

Thirst [Bakwji] (2009):  Korean ultra-stylist Chan-wook Park + vampirism; sounds like a match made in heaven (or hell) to us.  Buy from Amazon.

NEW ON BLU-RAY:

Fight Club (1999): David Fincher’s anarchic, very nearly surreal satire features brilliant performances by both Edward Norton and Brad Pitt.  It’s a weird movie favorite that’s long overdue on Blu-ray. Buy from Amazon.

What are you looking forward to? If you have any weird movie leads that I have overlooked, feel free to leave them in the COMMENTS section.

Not sure exactly what we’ll be reviewing next week, but for once, the problem is having too many options on what to publish, rather than too few. I think we’ll continue our “2009 in review” series with Growing Out, an indie horror about a musician who finds a head growing out of a cellar floor. We may also sneak in a review of Cold Souls, the Paul Giamatti expose about the black market soul trade. You can also expect to see a review of the offbeat 1979 vampire film Thirst. What else? Well, some possibilities include Johnny Got His Gun (1971), Killer Klowns from Outer Space (1988), Housekeeping (1987), and Feed (2005)—you’ll just have to check out this space to find out for sure.

As for the weirdest search term used to locate the site this week, we may as well pick “sex movie in which fairies come near water,” which sounds like pretty weird request but could actually refer to an actual movie we’ve reviewed here. On the other hand, our favorite search term used to locate the site was “why are weird movies always the best”?

Here’s how the reader-suggested review queue looks: Greaser’s Palace (substituted for Institute Benjamenta), Waking Life, Survive Style 5+, The Dark Backward, The Short Films of David Lynch, Santa Sangre, Dead Man, Inland Empire, Monday (assuming I can find an English language version), The Abominable Dr. Phibes, Barton Fink, What? (Diary of Forbidden Dreams), Meatball Machine, Xtro, Basket Case, Suicide Club, O Lucky Man! , Trash Humpers (if it’s released), Gozu, Tales of Ordinary Madness, The Wayward Cloud, Kwaidan, Six-String Samurai, Andy Warhol’s Trash, Altered States, Memento, Nightmare Before Christmas/Vincent/Frankenweenie, Johnny Got His Gun, The Science of Sleep, and Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Mind.

A look at what’s weird in theaters, on hot-off-the-presses DVDs, and on more distant horizons…

Trailers of new release movies are generally available on the official site links.

IN THEATERS (WIDE RELEASE):

The Box: A couple are given a mysterious box that contains a temptation; push a button on it and you will get a million dollars, but an innocent person somewhere will die. I passed on mentioning this one last week because the theatrical previews made it look like a lame and hokey extended Twilight Zone episode. I disregarded a few reports trickling in that said it was “weird,” assuming they came from the same type of people who find any fantasy weird. Then, I discovered that it was directed by Richard Kelly, which makes it noteworthy for this site. We probably should give it a shot despite the underwhelming reviews and uninspiring trailer. The Box official site (much like the Donnie Darko website, there’s no clear navigation and you’re forced to click around randomly to find stuff).

Fantastic Mr. Fox:  This animated fable about talking animals is clearly not weird, but it does represent a collaboration between two borderline weird figures: ultra-quirky director Wes (I Heart Huckabees) Anderson and mordant children’s book author Roald (Charlie and the Chocolate Factory) Dahl.  Featuring the voices of George Clooney, Meryl Streep, and Bill Murray.  Fantastic Mr. Fox official site.

IN THEATERS (LIMITED RELEASE):

Uncertainty: An experiment in conflicting storylines from two different directors, Uncertainty deals with a young couple whose day follows one of two paths, depending on the flip of a coin: one route leads to a family drama, the other to a murder thriller.  Uncertainty official site.

NEW ON DVD:

Ink (2009): Critics compared this visionary thriller about a father entering the nightmares of his daughter to the work of Terry Gilliam and Jean-Pierre Jeunet; its own press release compares it to Brazil, Dark City and Donnie Darko, among others. We’re cautiously optimistic; that’s some awfully lofty company. Expect a review in the coming weeks. Buy from Amazon.

NEW ON BLU-RAY:

Watchmen: The Ultimate Cut (2009): Read our Watchmen capsule. Hopefully, this four disc (!) Blu-ray release will be the ultimate edition of Watchmen, but would you truly be shocked if Warner came out with a 6-disc Watchmen: The Even Ultimater Cut in three months? At any rate, this new version integrates the fanboy demanded story-within-a-story “Tales of the Black Freighter” into the Director’s Cut. There’s also a disc of featurettes, a digital copy of the theatrical release, and a disc of “Complete Motion Comics” (whatever that means). Buy from Amazon.

NOTICE – POSSIBLE DOWNTIME:  Our webhost tells us they will be upgrading the servers on Monday, Nov. 9 and Tuesday, Nov. 10.  This may cause some limited interruptions in the availability of these pages.

Finally, we have an early frontrunner for weirdest movie of 2009! But what is it?  Spike (Adaptation) Jonze’s Where the Wild Things Are?  The independent twentysomethings-get-slaughtered-in-the woods horror film I Can See You?  Or are we contrarians who actually liked the widely despised Donnie Darko direct-to-DVD sequel, S. Darko? Check this space in next week to find out the shocking answer!

For our “weirdest search term used to locate the site” pick of the week, we’re dipping back into the overflowing “disturbing” file for “watch free rape nuns movies in the farms.”  We find this request both disquieting and encouraging.  The weird specificity of the search: not only “nuns,” but nuns “in the farms”—sets it apart from the generic sordid “watch free rape movies” garbage we get all the time.

But why in the world would we find a rape search encouraging?  Because it came from the Islamic Republic of Egypt.  I say this more than half-seriously: porn will destroy Islamic fundamentalism.  By pumping free porn behind enemy lines via broadband, we teach them the true value of freedom.  It may be a NeoCon myth that the huddled masses out there all yearn to be free, but they most certainly yearn to masturbate to freaky porn.  Show them a vision of a land overflowing with free rape movies, and they will eventually demand their governments give them the same freedom.  Worldwide democracy and an unprecedented era of global peace will inevitably follow.

On a more pleasant note, we finally have a Miss Weird Movie 2009!  Her name is Lola, and her favorite site is http://366weirdmovies.com!

Much thanks to the anonymous webmaster who spammed our server logs with this autogenerated image in order to promote some service or other, I forgot what it was.

Thanks to our decision to focus on 2009 releases, the reader-suggested review queue is growing quite unruly: Greaser’s Palace (substituted for Institute Benjamenta), Waking Life, Survive Style 5+, The Dark Backward, The Short Films of David Lynch, Santa Sangre, Dead Man, Inland Empire, Monday (assuming I can find an English language version), The Abominable Dr. Phibes, Barton Fink, What? (Diary of Forbidden Dreams), Meatball Machine, Xtro, Basket Case, Suicide Club, O Lucky Man! , Harmony Korine’s Trash Humpers (if it’s released), Takashi Miike’s Gozu, Tales of Ordinary Madness, The Wayward Cloud, Kwaidan, Six-String Samurai, Andy Warhol’s Trash, Altered States, Memento, Nightmare Before Christmas/Vincent/Frankenweenie, Johnny Got His Gun, and The Science of Sleep.  Although we’re focusing on 2009 release at the moment, Johnny Got His Gun is likely to jump the line due to the fact that this long-unavailable movie finally got a DVD release this year.