Hello weirdos and weirdettes and welcome to another edition of “what’s in the pipeline” for the coming week. Our upcoming slate of movie reviews features the searing schizophrenia drama Keane (2004); coverage of the cult favorite fantasy puppet pic The Dark Crystal (1982); the trilogy of weird featurettes from the Spanish underground that goes by the name Codex Attanicus; and Tod Browning’s The Devil Doll (1936) (notorious as the movie where Lionel Barrymore appears in drag).
Thanks to everyone who applied for the screener reviewing position. The position is filled, and we’ll see reviews start showing up soon (hopefully within two weeks).
As usual, we had a rash of bizarre and confounding search terms flow through our server logs this week, and we like to recognize them in our weekly “Weirdest Search Term of the Week” contest. To the person looking for info on “how to kill a weird mummy,” we sincerely hope you found the information you needed in time. Unfortunately we can’t help here without more specific information, as each weird mummy requires its own unique method of execution (as opposed to conventional mummies, who can be killed using ordinary ant and roach spray that you can find at your local grocery store). We also send out our sincere hope that the guy looking for the sadly non-existent site “exploding collegegirls.com” eventually found something suitable for that particular fetish (we have no problem with this particular kink so long as all explosions involve consenting adults). Proving once again that sometimes the simplest searches can be the weirdest, we award our “weirdest search term of the week” to “weird and bizarre movies that have lollipops.” Hmm… not much is coming to mind… The Wizard of Oz, maybe?
Here’s how the reader-suggested review queue stands (more titles after the break, as usual): Dark Crystal (next week!); Perfume: The Story of a Murderer;Throw Away Your Books, Rally in the Streets (this appears to be unavailable at present, actually); The Nines; The Pillow Book; Final Flesh; Lunacy [Sílení]; Inmortel (2004); Tetsuo; Dead Ringers; Kairo [AKA Pulse]; The Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE→
A look at what’s weird in theaters, on hot-off-the-presses DVDs, and on more distant horizons…
Trailers of new release movies are generally available on the official site links.
Lots of marginally weird stuff appearing in theaters this week, but be sure to scroll all the way down, because it’s a huge week for weird Blu-ray releases…
IN THEATERS (WIDE RELEASE):
Dylan Dog: Dead of Night: We mentioned this Hollywoodized bastardization of the surreal supernatural comic that was also the basis for Dellamorte Dellamore [Cemetery Man] as an upcoming cinema lowlight a few weeks ago. Now it’s finally here—and the producers haven’t allowed critics to screen it before release. That’s always a good sign, right? Dylan Dog: Dead of Night Facebook page.
IN THEATERS (LIMITED RELEASE):
13 Assassins: Epic samurai actioner about assassins planning to take down a cruel noble before he can ascend to the Japanese throne. Not weird in itself; we mention it because it’s from List laureate Takashi Miike (Visitor Q, Gozu), who’s finally won over mainstream Western critics with this conventionally-styled period outing. Opening today in Southern California, New York City, and Austin, TX, with scattered showings to follow across the country. 13 Assassins official site.
The Arbor (2010): Experimental documentary about English playwright Andrea Dunbar wherein professional actors lip-synch recordings of actual people. It’s not clear what purpose this “verbatim theater” technique serves, but critics have been eating it up, probably more because Dunbar’s underlying story is compelling than because of the formal experimentation. Playing at the Film Forum in Manhattan. The Arbor at the Film Forum.
Cave of Forgotten Dreams (2010): Sticking to this week’s theme of weird directors garnering praise for their mainstream efforts, Werner Herzog strikes critical gold with this documentary about an expedition to the Chauvet caves in France, home to the world’s oldest prehistoric paintings. Originally filmed in 3-D but you may be able to catch it in vanilla dimensions as well. Cave of Forgotten Dreams official Facebook site.
Pocong Mandi Goyang Pinggul: Via the miracle of intercutting, a hopping transvestite ghost bride (or something) stars alongside American pornstress Sasha Grey (late of Smash Cut) in this bizarre looking cut-n-paste Indonesian horror/comedy. According to the broken English news site 1001zones, Indonesian Islamic extremists are in an uproar about this release: “Indonesia is full of good people and why should make a porn movie, look for kosher food in a way,” threatened (?) a spokesman for the Islamic Defenders Front. Opening in Jakarta, domestic dates doubtful. I recommend everyone visit Sasha Grey’s Facebook page and support our petition for her to use her influence to ensure this gets a proper Region 1 DVD release.
We Go Way Back (2006): Drama about a 23-year old actress who finds herself haunted by her own 13-year old self. The premise the press release characterizes as “surrealistic” sounds like it belongs in the milder category of magical realism to us. The film won the Grand Jury Prize at the underground Slamdance festival, but it took five years to get its theatrical premier. We Go Way Back at reRun Gastropub.
IN DEVELOPMENT:
Dracula 3D (est. 2012): If you’re going to remake Dracula—a classic which has been adapted brilliantly in the past—you’d better have a unique angle on the old story lined up. To us, filming in 3D is not a promising spin on the legend. This flick will be helmed by Dario (Suspiria) Argento, whose forgettable recent work hasn’t come anywhere close to the spooky pinnacle he hit in the 70s. The best news we’ve heard on this possibly doomed project is that reliable Rutger Hauer has signed on to play Van Helsing.
Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (1998): Terry Gilliam‘s adaptation of Hunter S. Thompson’s satirical novel about a degenerate journalist and a libertine lawyer abusing mass quantities of drugs in Las Vegas is already on the List (though its entry is, er, missing at the current time). The strange story of the movie’s distribution rights continues: the Criterion Collection acquired the rights, then lost them, and now has them back to release this Blu-ray. This release is packed with the usual Criterion extras that are missing from Universal’s Blu-ray release that came out just last year—although we’re not certain whether any of them are new, or if they’re just restored extras from the previous Criterion release. At any rate, among the many features are three separate commentary tracks: one from Gilliam, one from stars Johnny Depp and Benecio del Toro, and one from Hunter himself. This is a Big Deal re-release. Buy Fear and Loathing in Las Vegas (The Criterion Collection) [Blu-ray].
Henri-Georges Clouzot’s Inferno (2009): This is part documentary, part reconstruction of “French Hitchcock” Henri-Georges Clouzot’s failed 1964 attempt to produce a movie titled L’Enfer, about a man whose jealousy causes him to hallucinate. The remaining footage is often weird indeed, with scenes of a nude woman tied to railroad tracks and mod, psychedelic color schemes. This is being released on Blu-ray only by Flicker Alley (who usually specialize in public domain silent films); no word on a Region 1 DVD. Buy Henri-Georges Clouzot’s Inferno [Blu-ray].
The Holy Mountain (1973): Read the Certified Weird entry! Jodorowsky set himself the task of topping El Topo‘s weirdness, and arguably succeeded with this tale of a Jesus figure who apprentices to an ascended Master and journeys to the Holy Mountain. Buy The Holy Mountain [Blu-ray].
VIDEO ON DEMAND:
13 Assassins (2011): See description under “limited release” above. In the very likely event that Miike’s samurai epic isn’t playing on a big screen near you, you can watch it on a video-on-demand rental for $6.99. Warning: this cut of the film (though presumably the same one playing in U.S. theaters) appears to be 20 minutes shorter than the director’s cut. Watch 13 Assassins On Demand.
What are you looking forward to? If you have any weird movie leads that I have overlooked, feel free to leave them in the COMMENTS section.
Anyone who might be interested in reviewing ultra low-budget movies in return for screeners, please see the “ad” below (or click here if you’re really lazy). We’ve had a couple of nibbles in our search for a dedicated microbudget reviewer, but we’ll hold the position open for at least a week or two.
Next week we’re planning reviews of the web-released amateur surrealist feature, The Casserole Masters (we’ll be embedding the movie along with info on the choice “chapter stops” to skip to, so be sure to tune in for that!) We’ll also take a look Smash Cut, the new slahser spoof/H. G. Lewis tribute from the auteur behind Jesus Christ Vampire Hunter, and we’ll be taking a second look at Jim Jarmusch‘s weird western Dead Man (long-time readers will guess what a “second look” indicates). Alfred will check in with another installment in his Tod Browning series, covering The Thirteenth Chair (Browning’s first sound film, with a pre-DraculaBela Lugosi replacing Lon Chaney as Browning’s leading man).
For the past seven days, plenty of perfectly strange candidates streamed through our server logs vying for the title of “Weirdest Search Term of the Week.” In the “okay, now we know you’re putting us on” category comes “spanish young imprisoned male breastfeeding movie.” That’s your last mention, guy; we won’t be recognizing any more searches for imprisoned male breastfeeding movies of various national cinemas. We have to give “movie foreskin surrealist” at least an honorable mention, but we were even more impressed by the ambiguity of the search for “paprika crotch,” since we don’t know whether the searcher was looking for Satoshi Konfan service or info on a new social disease. Turning to the classic test of utter incoherence to select the winner this week, however, we find that “clown gasmask movie pharmacy” beats out the field. Congratulations to the winner for stringing together four totally incongruous nouns!
Here’s how the reader-suggested review queue currently stacks up (many more titles after the break, as usual): The Casserole Masters (next week); Perfume: The Story of a Murderer; Dark Crystal; Throw Away Your Books, Rally in the Streets (this appears to be unavailable at present, actually); The Nines; The Pillow Book; Final Flesh; Lunacy [Sílení]; Inmortel (2004); Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE→
Sorry, the position below has been filled. Anyone who likes may still write a reader review for the site, but we won’t be offering screeners at this time. Thanks to all who applied!
366 World Industries is looking for someone to review movies—specifically, low-budget movies. Increased solicitation of our reviewing services by struggling filmmakers suggests to us it may be worthwhile to have someone on staff whose sole job it is to review low-budget screeners.
The ideal candidate will be able to write, preferably in the English language. The candidate must understand that accepting a screener copy of a movie is a commitment to watch and write about that movie. The candidate understands that these movies are by low-budget filmmakers and are highly likely to suck, with a few minor gems thrown in every now and then. The candidate should be aware that the movies will be a mix of arty, sometimes pretentious experimental films and gritty, sometimes offensive, exploitation movies. The candidate is encouraged to develop his or her own reviewing style, but we are not looking for someone who either A) praises everything unconditionally in hopes of seeing their names in print on a DVD cover, or B) views this assignment as an opportunity to sharpen their wit at the expense of the artists involved.
The review schedule is variable, but will not be more than one movie a week, and probably less than one a month.
Sole payment is in screener copies. Current contributors are welcome to apply.
Please use the contact form to apply. Use “screener review position” as the subject. If you have a writing sample, be prepared to submit it; if you are new to movie reviewing you should do a sample review of an appropriate low-budget movie first. We will answer any questions you have.
There is currently no time frame to fill this position. EDIT: Due to postal rates, we’d prefer applicants from the U.S.A.
A look at what’s weird in theaters, on hot-off-the-presses DVDs, and on more distant horizons…
Trailers of new release movies are generally available on the official site links.
Nothing of interest coming to theaters this week.
FILM FESTIVALS: TRIBECA (New York City, April 20-May 1):
The eighth annual running of the Manhattan-based festival co-founded by Robert De Niro. Tribeca Film, the distribution arm of Tribeca Enterprises, released 2009’s Certified Weird The Immaculate Conception of Little Dizzle, so you know these guys aren’t afraid to go weird. We list the features we think hold at least a little bizarre promise below:
Beyond the Black Rainbow: Surrealist sci-fi supposedly in the 2001 vein about a mute woman trying to escape from a mysterious enclave.
Bombay Beach: Footage of three residents of the decaying Salton Sea region—a bipolar boy, a high school athlete fleeing gang violence, and a retired oil-rig worker—is mixed with musical montages from Beirut and Bob Dylan to create what the makers describe as a “slightly surreal documentary experience.”
Detective Dee and the Mystery of the Phantom Flame: A mystery/action epic set in a fantastical steampunk China; some say this is a return to form for director Tsui Hark (Once Upon a Time in China, Zu Warriors)
Grey Matter [Matière Grise]: An African filmmaker is advised to make an upbeat film instead of his war atrocity opus, “Cycle of the Cockroach;” when he goes ahead with his original plan, he finds scenes from his script manifesting themselves in reality. This is the first movie we’ve ever heard of from a Rwandan director; it’s nice to imagine they’re starting their national film industry off weird.
Hideaways: Fantasy/fable about a teen who flees to the woods in an attempt to escape an inherited curse: he seems to be something of an accidental angel of death.
The Miner’s Hymns: 52-minute experimental film mixing old black-and-white footage of British coal miners with contemporary color footage, scored to a new avant-garde composition by Icelandic composer Jóhann Jóhannsson.
The Troll Hunter [Trolljegeren] – We mentioned this one in our Sundance column: it’s a Norwegian “found footage” film about a man who literally hunts trolls for the government. It’s weirdness is questionable, but it appears to be a crowd-pleaser.
Underwater Love – a “pink musical” (!) about a woman who falls in love with a water spirit; lensed by big-time cinematographer Christopher Doyle, with “outrageous” sex scenes
Heartless: Philip Ridley (writer/director of the Certified Weird The Reflecting Skin) is back after a fourteen year hiatus from filmmaking with this arthouse horror starring Jim (Across the Universe) Sturgess as a photographer with a disfiguring birthmark who makes a Faustian bargain in a hellish modern London. Ridley’s return would be notable even if the film wasn’t being well-reviewed; as it is, it won “Best Independent Feature” at the Toronto After Dark festival. Buy Heartless.
The Worst Horror Movie Ever Made (2005): An axe-wielding maniac interrupts a card game, and the survivors are thrown into a stream-of-consciousness nightmare of horror movie cliches. This frequently blasphemous amateur film (featuring Jesus pleasuring himself in a way only He could) from Bill Zebub (shouldn’t that be Bill Z. Bub?) was previously released in 2005; Zebub also remade the movie in 2008, but this is presumably an upgraded version of the original. Buy The Worst Horror Movie Ever Made.
NEW ON BLU-RAY:
Tokyo Gore Police (2008): The notorious, crazed gore-fest set in a future Tokyo where self-mutilation is a fad and private police hunt “engineers” who modify human bodies to turn genitalia into deadly bio-weapons. One Blu-ray disc, although reports say that the back cover claims the package contains two discs (because they recycled the art from the DVD version). Buy Tokyo Gore Police [Blu-ray].
FREE (LEGITIMATE RELEASE) MOVIES ON YOUTUBE:
Bad Taste (1987): Peter Jackson’s aptly named first movie is a gory comedy about aliens using the Earth as a fast food franchise. This is sitting deep in the reader-suggested review queue at the moment. Watch Bad Taste free on YouTube.
What are you looking forward to? If you have any weird movie leads that I have overlooked, feel free to leave them in the COMMENTS section.
Celebrating the cinematically surreal, bizarre, cult, oddball, fantastique, strange, psychedelic, and the just plain WEIRD!
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