Eaker vs. Eaker is the latest “send Alfred to the summer blockbuster movies so that he can curmudgeonly complain” event, but with a twist, cinema fans and friends! For the first time (without even knowing it), you voted to send Alfred and his wife, Aja, to the flicks and have them duke it out, publicly, about each so-called-blockbuster. Everybody here knows all about Alfred’s cinematic savvy, and his cranky-old-dog approach to film critique. Now, you get 2-for-1: Aja is Alfred’s beloved clinical and counseling psychologist partner, who loves to counter just about every cinematic point Alfred makes. You didn’t choose to send us to Ant-Man (2015), but we went nevertheless.
Alfred:
How much of the script for Ant-Man (2015) was written on a chalkboard? I imagine a bunch of executives sitting round the table, outlining the plot for its six writers: “To be successful, we have to follow the Marvel formula, have archetypes, etc.”
“Well, we can do it like Iron Man. Have the hero in and Ant-Man suit and a villain in a rival insect suit.”
“Ok, but Ant-Man is little. So what other movies are there about shrunken people.”
“Honey, I Shrunk the Kids.”
“Ok, good. What else?”
“The Incredible Shrinking Man.”
“Well, maybe, but that’s kind old, isn’t it?”
“Hey, it is about ants, so what about the Ants move?”
“Good thinking. Let’s look at Ants too. We need to give him a mentor, some comedy relief, and a femme fatale babe.”
“Ok, good, but we gotta give Ant-Man something to fight for. Audiences love little girls. Let’s give him a daughter.”
“Yeah, and the villain goes after her like that Octopus guy went after Spiderman’s aunt.”
“Or Lex Luthor when he went after Lois Lane.”
“We can even have a bald villain, like Luthor.”
“Let’s develop all that and up the ante. Make Ant-Man a divorcee—kind of a loser. He only gets to see his daughter on weekends.”
“Yeah, and his ex-wife is married to a jerk.”
“Right, and after learning her biological dad is Ant-Man, the daughter learns what a true hero he really is.”
“Now, we’re rolling. What else?”
“Let’s use the corporate bad guy plot, you know like making the big business guys trying to get the secrets of the suit, so they can sell it Continue reading EAKER VS EAKER AT THE SUMMER BLOCKBUSTERS (BONUS COVERAGE): ANT-MAN (2015)