Only 68 movies left to Certify Weird! (That number is right, we didn’t miscount: see the explanation below).
Alfred Eaker kicks us off next week with a review of Flicker Alley’s new Blu-ray release of the short that birthed the fantastique, “A Trip to the Moon.” Then, Bryan Pike updates you on the new existential indie release It Takes from Within, Pete Trbovich knocks one out of the review queue with a shout-out to Britain’s The Shout (1978), and G. Smalley goes classic and retro with an examination of ‘s surrealistic debut, Blood of a Poet (1930).
No fooling here: the quotes below are actual search terms weirdos used to find 366 Weird Movies this past week. First, the search for a “movie where man says etcettera” goes into our “can you narrow that down for me?” file. We would be remiss if we did not note the search for “lesbian girls and doll pul movies.com” (it was making sense until the “doll pul” arrived). Then we have a pair of perhaps related searches: a jazz cinema fan’s search for “sax films of 2012,” which might possibly be better found on the site “sax bandits.com”. Simple misspellings can sometimes lead to ambiguity: is the guy looking for “twin leaks 366 weird movies” actually looking for thetelevision series, or the pee fetish porn parody? A similar searching error led to our official Weirdest Search Term of the Week, “link floyd thé wool”. The misspellings are bad enough, but going out of your way to add an accent aigu to the “thé” that makes the search acutely weird.
On to the bit of business hinted at above: many of you have expressed dismay that the List of the 366 Best Weird Movies ever made is nearing its end, and are afraid that your worthy favorites will not fit into the few remaining slots. If you fall into that category, we have good news: we’re removing some of the dead wood to make way for better choices. Obviously, when we started this List ten years ago, we were very different people than now. As you may have noticed with Alfred’s series on spirituality themed movies, we are (a little!) more mature than the crazy live-for-today 40somethings who started this List. We recognize that we made mistakes in the early days (and even in the later days), and canonized a few movies of questionable intent that didn’t deserve to be honored. What better day than Easter Day, 2018 to announce a culling of the List and the rebirth of a new one? We’re going to free up twenty-seven movie slots by canceling several of our rasher and more questionable choices. These entries have already disappeared from the sidebar list; we’ll detail them below, with an explanation for each film’s removal.
REMOVED FROM THE LIST:
200 Motels (1971) – More of a music video than a movie. Plus, an oratorio to the penis is just dumb.
Antichrist (2009) – with the imminent advent of the actual, real-life Antichrist in these Last Days, we can’t really in good faith justify allowing Lars von Trier‘s pornographic mockery remain on the List.
The Beast [La Bête] (1975) – In the future we will not allow unholy bestiality porn to make the List.
Belladonna of Sadness (1973) – Just ultraviolent cartoon porn from the perverted Japanese.
Branded to Kill (1967) – Not weird, just incomprehensible., and therefore bad.
Cat Soup (2001) – We won’t be including any more movies with animal cruelty.
Cemetery Man [Dellamorte Dellamore] (1994) – Mocks the doctrine of the Resurrection.
City of Women (1980) – Feminazi propaganda.
A Clockwork Orange (1971) – regretted it and wanted it banned, and although we think there is a moral message buried in its depravity , we feel like we have to honor his wishes.
Daisies [Sedmikrásky] (1966) – Irresponsible movie that shows food being wasted while millions starve.
El Topo (1970) – Ugh, what were we thinking?
Enter the Void (2009) – Glamorizes drug abuse.
Häxan [Witchcraft Through the Ages] (1922) – Glamorizes witchcraft.
Love Exposure (2008) – Blasphemy, plus it’s too long to be called a movie. Should have been a miniseries.
Lucifer Rising (1981) – Nothing more than a filmed devil worship rite.
Marquis (1989) – Pro-Sadism.
Meet the Feebles (1989) – Kids might see it by accident, and we don’t want to be responsible for complaints from parents.
Natural Born Killers (1994) – We’re afraid that championing this pro-serial killer movie may make us vulnerable to litigation.
No Smoking (2007) – Too much smoking in this movie, may encourage rebellious youngsters to take up a deadly habit. It would be irresponsible to include it.
Sweet Movie (1974) – Double ugh.
Thundercrack! (1975) – NO MORE PORN! STOP SUGGESTING IT!!
Wax, or the Discovery of Television Among the Bees (1991) – Given recent bee depopulation, this one seems insensitive at best.
Zéro de conduite (1933) – May encourage disobedience and insubordination in school age children who are exposed to it.
With that bit of housekeeping out of the way, here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue stands: The Shout (next week!); Genius Party; The Idiots; “Premium” (depending on availability); Spermula; Killer Condom; I Am Here Now; Sir Henry at Rawlinson End; Moebius (1996); The Adventures of Picasso; Charly: Dias de Sangre (depending on availability); Anguish (1987); Buddy Boy (1999); Bliss (1985); La cicatrice intérieure; Amazon Women on the Moon; Chronopolis; Metropia; Zachariah; Battle in Heaven; The Taste of Tea; Evil Ed; Cafe Flesh; Buffet Froid; Dunyayi Kurtaran Adam [AKA Turkish Star Wars]; The Signal; “Chick”, Felidae; Decasia (2002); Killdozer; Electric Dragon 80,000 V; Strange Circus; Mad Detective; Revolver; Litan (1982) (depending on availability); La Razon de Mi Vida (pending English language DVD release); The Sailor Who Fell From Grace With the Sea; Bernie (1996) (depending on availability);Things (1989); Hair Extensions; Haggard; Svidd neger (depending on availability); RoboGeisha; Executive Koala; Coonskin; Time Masters; Hard Candy; Crash (1996); La Cravate; Spirits of the Air, Gremlins of the Clouds (depending on availability); Alphaville; Savages; Big River Man; Little Deaths; L’Ange; La Teta y La Luna; Finisterrae; Breakfast of Champions; Vase de Noces; Lucky; Ichi the Killer; La antena; Mystics in Bali; Feherlofia; Versus; Birth of the Overfiend; A Dog Called Pain; Memento Mori; That Deadwood Feeling; Happiness; Let the Right One In; Porcile [AKA Pigpen]; Underground; Hotel (2004); Hardgore; Survive Style 5+; The Last Movie; Lord Love a Duck; I Married a Strange Person; Rare Exports: A Christmas Tale; “The Canadian Films of Paul Driessen”; And The Ship Sails On; Mondo Trasho; Marat/Sade; Space Thang; Drunken Wu Tang [AKA Taoism Drunkard]; Insidious (2010); The Earl Sessions (2011); Sitcom; They Came Back, Prometheus’ Garden, “Harpya”; Bruce Lee vs. Gay Power; Dumplings; Return to Oz; “Star Maidens”; “The Mighty Boosh”; The Element of Crime; Lo; Roller Blade; Mind Game (2004); Dante’s Inferno; Calamari Wrestler; Death Powder (1986); Big Man Japan (official review); Angel in the Flesh: The Confidential Report on Mr. Dennis Duggan aka The King of Super 8 (if it’s released; the director says it might be); Static; “The Big Shave”; Incubus; Marebito; The Appointment (1981); The Cement Garden; Visions of Suffering; Singapore Sling (re-review); Koyaanisqatsi; Uzumaki [AKA Spiral] (official re-review); Hanger (2009); “Analog”; Daymaker; Nails; Monobloc (2005); Big Time; “Slow Bob in the Lower Dimensions”; Vakvagany; Momo (1986); Organ; Dance with the Devil; Frankenstein Meets the Space Monster; “Alicia”; Space Is the Place (official review); Killer Nun; The Nine Lives of Thomas Katz; Ascension; Mind Game; Brick; Creatures of Destiny; Goodbye 20th Century; Boxing Helena; Chappaqua; The Glamorous Life of Sachiko Hanai; Man Facing Southeast; City of Pirates; Pink Narcissus; Teknolust; Dark Side of the Heart; Period Piece; “One Soldier”; Thriller: A Cruel Picture; The Million Dollar Hotel; Diamond Flash; Green Snake; The 10th Victim; Anatomy of Hell; Christ the Movie; Pola X; Phase IV; Welcome to the Dollhouse; Berberian Sound Studio; L’Inferno (1911); Heartbeeps; Bibliotheque Pascal; Marutirtha Hinglaj; A Pure Formality; The Mysterians; Rock n’ Roll High School; Johnny Aquarius; Confessions of a Dangerous Mind; Citizen Dog; Criminal Lovers; The Cat in the Hat; The Sea That Thinks; In Search of the Titanic; Creating Rem Lezar; I Think We’re Alone Now; Edward II (Jarman); Wild Tigers I Have Known; I Never Left the White Room; Faust: Love of the Damned; King Lear (1987); Alien Alibi; La Cabina; Kung Pow: Way of the Fist; Four Rooms; The Cabinet of Dr. Caligari; “Afraid So,” Bhoner: The Movie; The Passion of Darkly Noon; Riki-Oh: The Story of Riki; Something Weird; Gorod Zero; Snow White and Russian Red; Sphere; Tout Va Bien; Flaming Creatures; A Woman’s Face (1941), 8 1/2 Women; Nick the Feature Film; Only God Forgives; Nitwit; Homebodies; Celestial Wives Of Meadow Mari; Fiend Without a Face; Fear X; We Are the Strange; Confessions; Monday (depending on availability); Vigasiosexploitation (Vol. 1); The Slit; Tasher Desh; Womb; The Spirit; Surviving Life: Theory and Practice; Galaxy of Terror; Blind Beast; Príncipe Azul (depending on availability); Samgeori Geukjang (AKA Midnight Ballad for Ghost Theater); Andy Warhol’s Dracula [AKA Blood for Dracula]; Death Powder; As Filhas do Fogo; The Killing Room; Fiend (1980); Strangers in Paradise (1984); Vinyan; Fellini’s Cassanova; Suddenly Last Summer; The Twonky; Emperor Tomato Ketchup; Frontier; Where the Dead Go to Die; Kárate a muerte en Torremolinos (depending on availability); Detention; The Fifth Season; Junkie (2012); The End of Evangelion; Gandu; Overdrawn at the Memory Bank; Dead Mountaineer’s Hotel; Excision; Lemora: A Child’s Tale of the Supernatural; A Spell to Ward Off the Darkness; Takeshis’; Om Dar-B-Dar; Live Freaky! Die Freaky!; Mécanix; Lucia (2013); Che strano chiamarsi Federico [How Strange to be Named Frederico] (2013); Cannibal! the Musical; A Quiet Place in the Country; Marketa Lazarova; House (1986); The Living and the Dead; In the Realm of the Senses; Shinbone Alley; Journey to the West [Xi you] (2013); Hitler: A Film from Germany; Never Belongs To Me; The Keep, Marebito;Theodore Rex; Pastoral Hide and Seek; Without Warning; Grimm Love; Alucarda; Impolex; Post Tenebras Lux; Tammy and the T-Rex; Waltz with Bashir; Le Orme [AKA Footprints on the Moon]; The Manipulator; Casshern; The Magic Toyshop; “The Fool and the Flying Ship”; Memoirs of a Survivor; The Giant Claw; Mr. Magorium’s Wonder Emporium; The Midnight After; The Last Wave; “Mouse Soup”; Encounters at the End of the World; Wave Twisters; Dr. Otto and the Riddle of the Gloom Beam;That Day; Spookies; “God Hates Cartoons”; Perfect Sense; “Hansel and Gretel” (Tim Burton); The Devil’s Chair; “Rabbits”; Little Murders; Allegro (2005); Messiah of Evil; Frankehooker; Throw Away Your Books Rally in the Streets; I’m Not There; Quicksilver Highway; “Hospital Brut”; Neji-Shiki; Dandy Dust; Palindromes (official review); Felix the Cat: The Movie; Freeway (1996); Totò che visse due volte; The Acid House (re-review); Hands of God (2005, d. Alyson Levy); Lakki… The Boy Who Could Fly [AKA Lakki… The Boy Who Grew Wings]; It’s Such a Beautiful Day; Tomorrow Night; Poultrygeist; The Tracey Fragments; Jigoku no Banken: Akai Megane [The Red Spectacles]; Tierra; Operation: Endgame; Kafka; Terror 2000; You Never Can Tell (1951); The Hunger (1983); Endgame (2000); Dreams That Money Can Buy; 12 Monkeys; Hotel (2001); Passages From Finnegans Wake; Mazeppa; Vegas in Space; The Magus; The Assignment: The Witches Talisman; White Tiger; Mickey One; Toys; Wise Blood; Ghosts Before Breakfast; Silver Heads; Cool World; Village of the Damned (1960); The 4th Man; The Plague Dogs; Electric Dreams; Wizard of Speed and Time; Motel Hell; Youth Without Youth; Following; Calimari Union; LFO; Helter Skelter (2012); Golem (1980); Sonatine; Gwen le Livre de Sable; The Outskirts (1998); Izo; The End of August at the Hotel Ozone; Werckmeister Harmonies; I Bought a Vampire Motorcycle; Brothers of the Head; Mystery Men; A Writer of Ghost Stories; Next Door [Naboer]; The Loved One; The Mirror; Until the End of the World; Overturn: Awakening of the Warrior; The Mysterious Castle in the Carpathians; Onibaba; Einstein’s Brain; The Beguiled; Fateful Findings; Bad Lieutenant; Magdalena Viraga; Le Météore; Fish Story; Coming Apart; Fatty Drives the Bus; Anna and the Wolves; Midori; Hanzo the Razor: Sword of Justice; Rows (2015); Horror (2002); Hysteria; I Married a Strange Person; Hentai Kamen; Future War; Decoder; The Hole; Human Nature; Andy Warhol’s Bad; The Great McGonagall; Bone, “Hen, His Wife”; A Journey Into Bliss; Subway (1985); Cheap Smokes; Gory Gory Hallelujah; The Adolescence of Utena; “Red, White and Zero”; Orlando; Tokyo Decadence; Who Can Kill a Child; Shakespeare’s Plan 12 from Outer Space; The Tune; The Virgin Psychics; Siesta; Bring Me The Head Of Alfredo Garcia; The Thingy: Confessions of a Teenage Placenta; Newsboys: Down Under the Big Top; Onirica: Field of Dogs; La Distancia; L’intrus (2004) [The Intruder]; Jacky in the Kingdom of Women; Ex-Drummer (re-review); Earth Minus Zero; Shakes the Clown; Spermicide; The Fabulous Baron Munchausen; The Ring Finger; Sauna (2008); Adam’s Apples; Fight Club; Dark Star; The Infernal Comedy: Confessions of a Serial Killer; Cast a Deadly Spell; “Bobby Yeah,” Cat Sick Blues; “Superstar: The Karen Carpenter Story”; The Last of Us; Die Fighting; Dead Billy; Hail the New Puritan; Deathgasm; Kamikaze Girls; The Eternity Man; Pistol Opera; Deafula; BoXed; Velvet Goldmine; Turbo Kid; The Cannibals (de Oliveira); Los Parecidos [The Similars]; Darktown Strutters; Underwater Love; Tales of Hoffman; Remainder; Deep Dark; Aaaaah!; Devil’s Rain, Jubilee, Welcome Home Brother Charles; Kung Fu from Beyond the Grave; Tough Guys Don’t Dance; Straight to Hell; Love, Honor and Obey; George Washington; Can Heironymus Merkin Ever Forget Mercy Humppe and Find True Happiness?; “Flowers and Bottoms”; Perils of Gwendoline in the Land of the Yik-Yak; EGG.; The Complaint of an Empress; Makkhi; The Dog’s Night Song; Big Meat Eater; End of the Road; Prayer of the Rollerboys; Cool Cat Saves the Kids; “Penda’s Fen”; Imprint; Kultur Shock!; Melancholie der Engel; The Aimed School; The Mask (1961); Shackled; Hukkle;Beg!; Juliet of the Spirits; The Lickerish Quartet; Gothic & Lolita Psycho; The Wild World of Batwoman; Carnival Magic; “Am I Normal? A Film About Male Puberty”; “The Flood” (TV, 1987); The Mouse and His Child; Walker; It Couldn’t Happen Here; Spork; Mr. Blot’s Academy; Track 29; Speed Racer; From Morn to Midnight; Human Animals; U-Turn; Blood for Dracula; Blood, Bullets, Buffoons; Mishima: Life in Four Chapters; ¡Vivan las antípodas!; The Woman in the Fifth; Slipstream; Malatesta’s Carnival of Blood; Izo (2004); Essex Spacebin; Funny Bones; The Vagrant; “Factory Witch”; Dante 01; The Legend of 1900; Blak Mama; Artemis 81; Dancer in the Dark; Brotherhood of the Wolf; Body Troopers; Jawbreaker; Rocks in My Pocket; Samurai Rauni Reposaarelainen; The Golem; Blood-Spattered Bride; Trapped in the Closet; Penitentiary III; Aachi & Ssipak; Cosmos; Pig; Kung Fury; Whatever Happened to Vileness Fats; Roots of Evil; Combat Shock; Dream-Quest of Unknown Kadath; Les garcons sauavges [The Wild Boys]; and Helen Keller vs. Nightwolves.
OUT OF PRINT/NOT YET ON REGION 1 DVD HOLDING PEN: We’re holding off on reviewing these in case they get an official release down the line: Liquid Sky (re-review); Celine and Julie Go Boating; The Real McCoy (we’re now of the opinion that this portrait of “Hanoi Rocks” singer Andy McCoy is unlikely to be released in any form); Themroc; Happy End; Habfürdő [Bubble Bath] (Hungarian), Angel’s Egg (reviewed, but still awaiting release), Arrebato, The Last Days of Planet Earth; Jack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); The Drifting Classroom; Uncle Meat; 1 Day; Vermilion Souls; The Annunciation (1984); Visitor of a Museum [Posetitel muzeya].