Tag Archives: Everything is Terrible!

Capsules, Free Online Weird Movies

POD 366, EP. 49: EVERYTHING IS TERRIBLE! (EXCEPT THIS INTERVIEW)

Leave a comment

366 Weird Movies may earn commissions from purchases made through product links.

Audio only link (Soundcloud download)

Quick links/Discussed in this episode:

Everything Is Terrible! – keep up with the latest Terrible! stuff at the EiT! official website (and YouTube channel)

Deep Astronomy and the Romantic Sciences (2023): Discussion begins. Listen to our interview with director Cory McAbee. An absurdist collage film from and his collaborative Captain Ahab’s Motorcycle Club, it plays like a series of music videos, TED talks, PSAs and other stuff as a cyborg at a bar tries to figure out humanity. Playing for free at McAbee’s site. Watch Deep Astronomy and the Romantic Sciences free at Red Planet Planning Commission.

“Enter the Video Store: Empire of Screams”: Discussion begins. A set of video-store B-movies from Empire International Pictures, including The Dungeonmaster (1984), ‘s Dolls (1986), Cellar Dweller (1987), Arena (1989), and Robot Jox (1989, again from Gordon). Previously released in a “limited edition,” while this release is merely a “special edition” (the discs themselves appear the same, but this release comes without posters, postcards, and other promotional items). Buy “Enter the Video Store: Empire of Screams.”

The Eternal Recurrence (2024?): “Jim” recounts his dreams, which include aliens, monsters, bad parents, and a visit from Friedrich Nietzsche, all realized by A.I. From (Elevator Movie), this is already completed and to be released sometime in 2024 (probably) . No official site.

Godard Cinema (2023): Discussion begins. A documentary retrospective of ‘s career. Playing in New York, Los Angeles and Montreal this week; in some venues it screens together with Godard’s unfinished final movie, “Trailer of a Film That Will Never Exist: Phony Wars.” We wouldn’t expect too long a wait before it shows up on VOD and physical media. Godard Cinema official site.

Oldboy (2003): Discussion begins. Read Gregory J. Smalley’s review. Oldboy has never been hard to see, but now we have the “Deluxe Ultra 4K Limited Edition” on UHD with an advertised 18 hours of special features (although to be fair, 6 of those hours are director commentaries). At this writing, this set is sold out. Hopefully, more units will be coming before you have to pay jacked-up prices on the secondary market—or just wait for a standard edition in a few months. Buy Oldboy.

Suspect Zero (2004): Discussion begins. A psychological thriller from about a psychic FBI agent turned serial killer (of serial killers). This one fell through the cracks, but likely has interesting elements. Buy Suspect Zero.

The Terror (1936)/Little Shop of Horrors (1960): Discussion begins. Read Alfred Eaker’s review of The Terror and Gregory J. Smalley’s review of Little Shop of Horrors. The Terror is now restored! (but why?); both films on the double feature disk get commentary tracks.  Buy The Terror (1936)/Little Shop of Horrors (1960).

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE:

Pod 366 will be taking a week off for the holidays next week, but we will still have a light “Weird Horizon” for you on Friday. In written reviews, Shane Wilson buries another one that Came from the Reader-Suggested Queue with his take on the 1965 funeral parlor satire The Loved One; Giles Edwards covers the new Werner Herzog doc Werner Herzog: Radical Dreamer (2023), and El Rob Hubbard prepares you for The Sudbury Devil (releases 12/21/2023). Gregory J. Smalley is considering taking the week off, but may pop in to catch up. Onward and weirdward!

Saturday Short, Shorts

SATURDAY SHORT: JIM BAKKER’S BUCKETS (2015)

Leave a comment

Vic Berger has made a name for himself by taking television segments, and editing them to obscurity. In this short Jim Bakker offers his viewers twenty-eight buckets of food to survive the impending apocalypse that started last year. If you didn’t spend $2,500 plus shipping to prepare, don’t worry. A review of the cement-flavored potato soup encouraged starvation as an alternative.

Canonically Weird (The List)

131. DOGGIEWOGGIEZ! POOCHIEWOOCHIEZ! (2012)

7 Comments

“We’ve always had a thing with how people treat little people at Everything Is Terrible!, like it’s really weird and creepy… I think it’s the same thing with humans and dogs. They’re weirdly sexualized, they’re weirdly turned into little kids at the same time. When they’re your best friend it turns into this weird, gross, furry pile where you can’t tell where the lines are between human and dog, master and slave, and sex, and it’s just ugh. In that way it turned out to be perfect, because when you watch The Holy Mountain you’re so confused about the world and you feel icky, but at the same time it’s beautiful. It felt perfect when it was coming together because it was gross but then you put 15 layers of dogs together and be like, ‘I think that’s kind of beautiful.'”–Commodore Gilgamesh on Doggiewoggiez! Poochiewoochiez!

Recommended

DIRECTED BY: Commodore Gilgamesh, Ghoul Skool

FEATURING: None (some recognizable actors and celebrities can be glimpsed in movie clips)

PLOT: This movie is 55 minutes of clips of strange and funny dog clips from movies and videotapes, arranged into a pop-absurdist montage that loosely follows the plot of Alejandro Jodorowsky‘s The Holy Mountain. Appropriated scenes range from major motion pictures like Beethoven to direct-to-video instructional manuals on dog massage, with the snippets arranged thematically (dog grooming, dog sex, talking dogs making terrible puns, etc). The editing crew also takes the canine footage and manipulates it into original psychedelic collages to further strengthen the connection to the mystical Mountain.

Still from Doogiewoggiez! Poochiewoochiez!

BACKGROUND:

  • Everything is Terrible! is a consortium that collects strange and funny found footage clips from how-to videos, amateur Christian puppet shows, infomercials, and other video detritus of the past, often transforming the results with simple editing techniques to make it even weirder. Their website has been active since 2007. The members post under pseudonyms and only appear in public wearing fuzzy monster masks (although at Doggiewoggiez live screenings, they appeared in dog masks instead).
  • Everything is Terrible! released two previous full-length compilations of found-footage clips—Everything is Terrible! The Movie and 2Everything2Terrible2: Tokyo Drift—but Doggiewoggiez! Poochiewoochiez! was their first themed release and their most conceptually ambitious project.
  • The movie’s extremely modest $2,000 budget was successfully funded via the crowdsourcing website Kickstarter.
  • One source reports the film contains 1500 cuts (which would work out to about one scene every 2 seconds). It took a little over a year to assemble the footage.

INDELIBLE IMAGE: “The Dog Molecule” segment, where we see a puppy puffing on a tiny pipe version of its own head, and the camera pulls back to reveal an identical third pooch puffing on that canine.

WHAT MAKES IT WEIRD: Constructing a remake of the flamboyant Surrealist epic The Holy Mountain would be a fool’s errand; there would be no way to out-weird the original. Unless, of course, you remade the self-indulgent spiritual odyssey as a comedy, illustrating the key scenes using found footage from crappy dog videos. Then, you’d be creating a parallel universe of weirdness.

Teaser for Doggiewoggiez! Poochiewoochiez!

COMMENTS: A startling indictment of the indignities desperate Hollywood producers will inflict upon man’s best friend in the name of cheap Continue reading 131. DOGGIEWOGGIEZ! POOCHIEWOOCHIEZ! (2012) →

List Candidates

LIST CANDIDATE: DOGGIEWOGGIEZ! POOCHIEWOOCHIEZ! (2012)

Doggiewoggiez! Poochiewoochiez! has been promoted onto the List of the 366 Best Weird Movies of all time. Please make any comments on the official Certified Weird entry.

Recommended

DIRECTED BY: Commodore Gilgamesh, Ghoul Skool

FEATURING: None (found footage and movie clips, although you can catch glimpses of faded celebrities like Tim Allen and Gary Busey)

PLOT: 55 minutes of 1 to 5 second clips of strange and funny dog footage from movies and

Still from Doogiewoggiez! Poochiewoochiez!

videotapes, arranged into a psychedelic montage that loosely follows the plot of Alejandro Jodorowsky‘s surrealist epic The Holy Mountain.

WHY IT MIGHT MAKE THE LIST: You would think a “remake” of The Holy Mountain made up from found footage of dog movies would easily qualify as one of the 366 weirdest movies of all time. There are only two obstacles to adding Doggiewoggiez! to the List immediately. One is a philosophical issue: since this is just a compilation of clips—albeit one put together with wit and skill—with no original material save for a few kaleidoscopic canine collages, does it even meet the definition of a “movie”? The second objection is more practical than philosophical: if Doggiewoggiez! is in fact a “movie,” it potentially fails “the grandma test.” When considering a movie for the List, I imagine showing the movie to my grandma (God rest her soul); if at any time during the imaginary screening she leaves the room, muttering under her breath, “that was weird,” I add the film to the List. Now, I didn’t show this movie to my dead grandma, but I did show it to a living grandma—and she loved it and thought it was cute. Can a movie be truly weird if dog-loving grandmas find it adorable?

COMMENTS: A startling indictment of the indignities desperate Hollywood producers will inflict upon man’s best friend in the name of cheap entertainment, Doggiewoogiez! features every terrible sub-Disney talking dog movie in which an uncomprehending pooch is forced to recite a horrible pun acting against a slumming Dave Thomas, Fred Willard, or Cuba Gooding, Jr. And it’s not just the major Hollywood players that are into abusing the long-suffering fidos, either, as Doggiewoggiez! collects plenty of examples of amateurs touting undignified forms of dog massage, puppy training, and owners posing nude with their pooches. The consortium at Continue reading LIST CANDIDATE: DOGGIEWOGGIEZ! POOCHIEWOOCHIEZ! (2012) →

Saturday Short, Shorts

SATURDAY SHORT: SINGING BABIES!

Leave a comment

Everything is Terrible! is a group whose sole purpose is to take the most hilariously awful VHS tapes they can find, and post them on YouTube for everyone to loathe or enjoy, depending on their sense of humor. What’s perhaps more weird than the video itself is the thought that whoever made this was, more than likely, a little serious when doing so.

 

More of Everything is Terrible at their website: http://www.everythingisterrible.com/.