Category Archives: Pipelines (Archived)

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

First, a heads up: look for a new free DVD contest announcement later tonight/tomorrow morning. It’s your chance to score a strange and random stocking-stuffer at the last moment.

We continue our countdown to 2017 as we catch up on 2016’s releases, which weirdly includes mostly films made prior to 1963. We will bring one release from this year for you when Shane Wilson covers the hipster draman Birds of Neptune. Then G. Smalley jumps way back in time to look at the Blu-ray release of Marcel L’Herbier’s overlooked avant-garde silent classic L’Inhumaine, while Giles Edwards brings us the site’s first look at ‘s 1963 Surrealist satire The Exterminating Angel (it was scheduled for earlier, but Giles found himself inexplicably unable to stop writing the review for weeks on end). Alfred Eaker continues the look backwards as he embarks on part one of a two-part retrospective on Italian horror icon . Stay tuned…

…for our rundown of the very weirdest search terms that brought visitors to the site this week. We’ll start with the inexplicable “czechoslovakia-made incest-made hereford” (Hereford is a city in England and a breed of cattle; the connection to Czechoslovakia and incest is as mysterious as the repeated use of the “-made” suffix). As weird as that one was, we thought the search for “big worm only eating for humman brain and then army to destroy the animal is hollywood movie” was even stranger. But neither top our Weirdest Search Term of the Week, “movies last seen girl jesus looked blood drink and spit the dracula head and dracula end movies.” As far as we can make out, the searcher is looking for a movie where Jesus (or maybe a girl Jesus) spits out Dracula’s head? Weird.

Here’s how our ridiculously-long-and-ever-growing reader-suggested review queue stands. Note: we’re moving the Japanese version of Jack and the Beanstalk into the “Currently Unavailable” holding pen. The rest of the list follows: The Saragossa Manuscript; The Drifting Classroom; Brain Dead; Uncle Meat; Nuit Noire; Screamplay; Grendel Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

As we approach the end of 2016, we try to play catch-up on all the year’s video releases, as we do every year. That doesn’t mean we’ll only 2016 movies, however, as this week proves. Shane Wilson starts us off with a look at the wacky 1965 yakuza comedy Murder Unincorporated (the weirdest choice on Arrow Videos 2016 “Nikkatsu Diamond Guys Vol. 2” set). G. Smalley kills two birds with one stone (technically four birds with two stones) as he knocks out both new releases and reader-suggestions with a look at the DVDs for 1982’s Neil Young-directed absurdity Human Highway and the Criterion Collection release of Akira Kurosawa’s Dreams (1990). Alfred Eaker, meanwhile, does his own thing as he continues his exploitation film series with a look at 1964, the year that brought us 2000 Maniacs, The Creeping Terror, Straight-Jacket, and of course the immortal The Incredibly Strange Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies. Check out 366 all week in between trips to the mall (or to amazon.com).

It’s time once again for the beloved feature where we survey the weirdest search terms that brought visitors to the site this week: a feature that, as always, we are calling “Weirdest Search Terms of the Week.” We start with the remarkably simple but still incomprehensible search for “head 22.” Our next highlight, “80s porn guy with necklace fell in girl,” is easier to understand, but perhaps even harder to imagine. And we’d also kind of like to know the answer to “whose the bad actor who, rode a bike, and laughed stpidly, & pervert.” But our official choice for Weirdest Search Term of the Week blows them all away with its oddity: “older films that woman is forced by men dressed as ancient romans the hats sex is a big cow horn.” I was almost with them until they claimed sex is a big cow horn… it’s not, it’s really not.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Human Highway (next week!); Akira Kurosawa’s Dreams (next week!); Jack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); The Saragossa Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Thanksgiving is over, and so we’re no longer thankful—instead, we’re getting down to the nitty-gritty as the year nears its end. Next week, Ryan Aarset has a Delusion (a low budget thriller from 2016) and G. Smalley has Gas-s-s-s (the 1970 counterculture comedy about a gas that wipes out everyone over the age of 25). G. will also quietly return to the asylum to reconsider The Ninth Configuration. Meanwhile, Alfred Eaker returns to his irregularly scheduled exploitation triple feature series, masochistically looking at the year 1963 (which brought us The Sadist, Blood Feast, and The Body and the Whip). It hurts so good!

It’s a slight week for weird search terms that brought visitors to the site, but as always we’ll bring you a survey of what we saw. First off, this is probably a description of a scene in real movie (probably a Japanese one), so it can’t be considered as one of the very weirdest of all searches, but in a slow week we couldn’t resist bringing “movie where guy takes looks of.blue pills and beats people with the erection” to your attention. The search for “69 whererites” is stranger (“69” we get, but what about “where rites”? Are there rites of 69 we haven’t been informed of?) We’ll accept the confused “a woman upskirt show aman his bodie” as our official Weirdest Search Term of the Week, though you guys out there in Googleland will need to play it weirder next week. If you don’t, we may have to show you your bodie.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Jack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); The Saragossa Manuscript; The Drifting Classroom; Brain Dead; Uncle Meat; Nuit Noire; Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Last week we quietly rolled out our Twitter presence—after getting our feet wet and learning our #’s from our @’s, we’re ready to officially announce ourselves to the Twittersphere. Follow us at https://twitter.com/366weirdmovies (that’s @366weirdmovies, logically).

Next week, Pete Trbovich is thankful for the opportunity to review the microbudget sci-fi spoof First Man on Mars (if not for the movie itself); G. Smalley is thankful for elliptical Taiwanese arthouse dramas like Kaili Blues; 366 Weird Movies is thankful for its readers pitching in on a holiday, as we’ll publish another Reader Recommendation, and we’re also thankful for The Plutonian‘s Scott Dwyer helping out with his list of his ten favorite weird movies; and Alfred Eaker, naturally, is thankful for Christian anti-drug movies about pot laced with experimental drugs that turn motorcycle delinquents into turkey-headed killing machines. Aren’t we all?

Other things we’re thankful for include the scores of entertainingly odd search terms that bring visitors to our site each week, items we collect and publish for you in a feature we call Weirdest Search Terms of the Week. It was a very full week, so we’ll just jump right into our survey with “watcheth the mother from under full movi,” a search we like to imagine was made by a time-traveling 19th century English fop drunk on laudanum. Next up is the disturbing yet absurd “3women raping an attached boy”—just how does the geometry work on that? And what red-blooded male or randy lesbian wouldn’t like to find a “list of tv series with more vagina nudity than lifebon top”? For our official Weirdest Search Term of the Week, we’ll go with “top worrier in hollywood solder emipairs witch.” Even guessing at the spelling errors and changing it to “top warrior in Hollywood soldier empowers witch” yields no clue as to what strangeness that searcher was seeking.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands. [Note: we’re moving The Last Days of Planet Earth to the holding pen (see bottom of this post) because of lack of current availability (VHS release only, now collector’s items)]. Jack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); The Saragossa Manuscript; The Drifting Classroom; Brain Dead; Uncle Meat; Nuit Noire; Screamplay; Grendel Grendel Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Here’s what we got for you next week: Giles Edwards watches eat a sea monster heart in the modern dark fairytale Tale of Tales, G. Smalley leers at lovely Ewa Aulin as she’s pawed by Marlon Brando and other slumming stars in Candy, Alex Kittle expands on her thoughts about farting corpses in Swiss Army Man, and Alfred Eaker hits the bookshelf for a literary review of Phil Hall’s recent tome “In Search of Lost Films.” Get thankful early as we bring you another weekly cinematic feast!

Now is the time when we look at the weirdest search terms that brought people to the site this week, a feature we quite sensibly call “Weirdest Search Terms of the Week.” It was indeed a strange seven days, as Googlers out there came here looking for both “weliwd movies” and examples of the “strngee.ssuraal.” Those two searchers were probably happier with their results than was the gentleman who mistakenly visited us looking for “israel classic boobs films.” We don’t feature any classic Israeli boob films here, though we certainly have nothing against them! And although we did see this movie, we don’t remember the scene this guy was looking for in quite the same way: “in silence of the lambs the red dragon was dancing to an old 60 psychedelic tongue in the mirror.” With all that, we think the very Weirdest Search Term of the Week was the impressively detailed “whose are hollywood movie which fearness minded scientist mechanical engineering research sex for long time but sex is very long and movie are also long and movie is type of in made forest.” Whose are, indeed!

Here’s how the ridiculously-long-and-ever-growing reader-suggested review queue now stands: Candy (next week!); The Last Days of Planet EarthJack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); The Saragossa Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

It’s Halloween week, so we’ll dig into that bag of reader-suggested reviews for a couple of cinematic treats (and tricks?). First off, in the spirit of the All Hallow’s Eve we’ll take a gander at 1985’s influential zombie-fest Return of the Living Dead, which just came out in a massive special edition Blu-ray this year. Next up is a horror of a very different kind as Shane Wilson tackles 1967’s provocative Titicut Follies, set in a Massachusetts “hospital” for the criminally insane, one of he most depressing documentaries on man’s inhumanity to man ever put on film. We’ll lighten the mood with a reappraisal of Rubin & Ed, arguably weirdo ‘s finest moment, before Alfred Eaker returns to the dark side finish off his “Boris Karloff’s Thriller” series. It’s another bipolar week in store here at 366 Weird Movies!

Oddly, our search traffic was up this week, but the weirdness quotient of said visitors was down, making it a tough to pick a winner in our Weirdest Search Term of the Week contest. We don’t know what this says about our readership, but we note an unhealthy misogynistic streak in the oddball traffic, with people (OK, men) looking for “execution women artnetwork movies” and “naked women dead in the pool movies.” By those standards, “horror old movie in which a girl dance with cutted head & a boy sees her” is a normal, healthy thing to search for. We had to delete our first choice for this week’s winner because following the Google query led to some very disturbing internet neighborhoods we would prefer not to promote, so instead we’re granting the weirdly conversational “i’m in the movie man not a cop and got the cult gates please come home” official Weirdest Search Term of the Week status. We’ll take our lumps and hope for better (and weirder) next week.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Titicut Follies (next week!); Return of the Living Dead (next week!); Candy; The Last Days of Planet EarthJack and the Beanstalk Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

You have until midnight tonight to join in 366’s virtual costume party for a chance to win a two-DVD prize package. So far the party’s got Merde, Alex de Large, the actual Wicker Man (with Edward Woodward inside) and more weirdos milling about. Pick a Certified Weird costume and join us, won’t you? Your chances of winning the prize currently stand at just under 10%.

After you’re done with that, you can consider next week’s slate of reviews, starting with new writer Pete Trbovich considering ‘s finest drag performance, 1989’s Sonny Boy; G. Smalley wondering if he could review ‘s latest adventure in dreamy narcolepsy, Cemetery of Splendor, in his sleep; Giles Edwards facing another of ‘s existential identity crisis movies in 1966’s The Face of Another; and fourth installment of his October series on “Boris Karloff’s Thriller” as Halloween closes in.

We’re way past the fourth installment in our long-running “Weirdest Search Term of the Week” contest—more like the four-hundredth installment, with no sign of stopping until Google get embarrassed by all this drastic weirdness and starts masking every single search request. Until then, we’ll keep wondering in amazement at searches like “the boy, nude cleaning octopus movie” or the curious (perhaps related?) “high mood beastiality.” Then there are the incomprehensible, yet disturbing, searches, like “fish cuck men com.” This week, a combination of unfocused perverted ideas, senseless repetition, and terrible spelling wins the prize for Weirdest Search Term of the Week, which we award to the bizarre “idian brest fidding big boobes gore gore.” ‘Nuff said—although we don’t really know exactly what was said?

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: The Face of Another (next week!); Candy; The Last Days of Planet EarthJack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); The Saragossa Manuscript; The Drifting Classroom; Brain Dead; Uncle Meat; Nuit Noire; Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

It’s election season, and Shane Wilson will start off the week campaigning for the strange 1960s satire Wild in the Streets (about a rock star who becomes president and sentences squares to LSD concentration camps). Then Shane looks at the reader-suggested queue to see if you should vote for ‘s Drowning by Numbers for the List of the 366 Weirdest Movies of All Time, while G. Smalley wonders if 1968’s If… is the outsider candidate we need. Alfred Eaker pitches in with the continuation of his “Boris Karloff’s Thriller” episode guide. It’s all part of our plan to Make America Weird Again!

Not only that, but we’ll be matching our rhetoric with free DVDs as we host another giveaway contest—lesbian vampire fans, in particular, will want to keep an eye out for that one.

Now, it’s time once again for us to survey this week’s candidates as deranged Googlers vie for the title of “Weirdest Search Term of the Week.” First off, we have to mention the search for “very bigger white boobs movie.com”—we’re sorry to report that (obviously) no such site exists, but we hope you enjoyed your visit here instead. “Sci fi movie with woman sentenced immortality from saliva” is a bit stranger; even we’ve never heard of this spit-immortality sci-fi flick. But even that’s not as bizarre as “wouldnt there be 2 gretchen in the tu like there are 2 franks”; we actually kind of know what the searcher’s getting at, but wow, that phraseology!The incomprehensibility of the search terms peaks, however, with with the stream-of-subconsciousness babble “nope i could you be getting a lien on a movies look like the visiting a movies,” our nominee for Weirdest Search Term of the Week.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Drowning by Numbers (next week!); If… (next week!); Candy; The Last Days of Planet EarthJack and the Beanstalk (1974, Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Here’s what we got for ya next week: Giles Edwards goes underground for the scoop on the low-budget thriller Sole Proprietor, G. Smalley sniffs the weird 1974 giallo The Perfume of the Lady in Black, and, in an overdue move that will appease many long-time readers, El Rob Hubbard takes a second look at the octopus-monster infidelity melodrama Possession (our initial 2011 “List Candidate” review scandalized many weird fans, drawing the most comments of any article we’ve ever published). Also, recovering from his latest disappointingly peculiar brush with the whimsical world of Tim Burton, Alfred Eaker returns to sanity with part 2 of his “Boris Karloff’s ‘Thriller'” episode guide (part 1 is here, if you want to brush up). We’re all over the map, and we wouldn’t have it any other way!

That brings us to our survey of the weirdest search terms that brought people to the site this week, a feature we quite logically call “Weirdest Search Terms of the Week.” We’ll start by highlighting the person weirdly searching for “man poses in robe on couch with something between his legs back in the 90’s” (the quotation marks are in original, meaning he was looking for that exact phrase). Next up is the incomprehensible yet self-explanatory search for “sixy porn hippopotamus.” By contrast, the person looking for “the boobs of fellini films” seems relatively sane, although it’s still pretty funny. Our winner of the Weirdest Search Term of the Week, however, is unquestionably “list of hilly films about angry claymation penis.” We not sure what’s weirdest there: the angry claymation penis itself, the bizarre adjective “hilly,” or the fact that the searcher wants a list, meaning he thinks there are multiple hilly films in the angry animated phallus genre.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Possession re-review (next week!); Candy; The Last Days of Planet EarthJack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); Drowning by Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Next week at 366 Weird Movies, El Rob Hubbard goes On the Silver Globe, G. Smalley checks out ‘s The Lady in the Car with Glasses and a Gun, and we’ll stay in France for a second look at ‘s Play Time. Alfred Eaker’s Fringe Cinema will be a surprise—there’s a couple different ways he might go. What will the List look like after another crazy week?

Speaking of weekly craziness, it’s time once more for our survey of the weirdest search terms that brought people to the site this week—a feature that we, quite sensibly, call “weirdest search terms of the week.” We’ll start by noting the baffling search for information on “village teen bra wire how do it video.” But the theme of the week is the growing dominance of the Chinese in the field of bizarre search strings. “chinese exotic flying penis movie” is just a hint of what’s to come, as the People’s Republic also delivers our official Weirdest Search Term of the Week: “china love feeling sperm rabit eting comydy film.” Demographically, the future of weirdness runs through the Far East, and I personally look forward to a world dominated by sperm-eating rabbit comedy films (I think).

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: On the Silver Globe (next week!); Candy; The Last Days of Planet EarthJack and the Beanstalk (1974, Japan); Drowning by Numbers; The Saragossa Manuscript; The Drifting Classroom; Brain Dead; Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE