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WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Next week, Alfred Eaker branches off from his “spirituality” mini-series with a mini-mini-series as he begins a discussion of ‘s “Silence of God” trilogy with a look at the first entry, Through a Glass Darkly. Then,

Last week was not that weird a week in weird search terms, which makes for a weak week in our search for the Weirdest Search Term of the Week. We’re down to “weird film where angels kiss etc” for our honorable mentions (and but for the superfluous “etc,” that wouldn’t even have caught our notice). “vampie hunler caphuled” is only worth a mention due to the outstandingly drunken spelling. Fortunately, we have one legit weird search term in “sex scene lays on a sack rejected” to salvage the week.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue stands: Catch-22 (next week!); Darc Arc; Genius Party; The Idiots; The Shout; “Premium” (depending on availability);  Spermula; Killer Condom; The Godmonster of Indian Flats; I Am Here Now; Sir Henry at Rawlinson End; Moebius (1996); The Adventures of Picasso; Charly: Dias de Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

AND THE WINNERS OF THE 8TH ANNUAL WEIRDCADEMY AWARDS ARE….

In just a few hours, the telecast of the Oscars (or, as we refer to them, the “Weirdcademy Awards for squares”) will begin. We are happy to steal the Academy’s Thunder by announcing cinema’s weirdest winners of 2017 now.

In the category of “Weirdest Short Film,” the winner is for her strangely erotic (?) “Hi Stranger.” It’s OK, you can look at his butt.

In the category of “Weirdest Scene,” the Weirdcademy Award goes to mother! for the scene where Jennifer Lawrence’s unwanted houseguests send her newborn baby crowd surfing. No clip, because we wouldn’t want to spoil this for anyone who has yet to see the movie.

mother! weirdest scene of 2017

In the category of “Weirdest Actress,” the Award goes to… Jennifer Lawrence, for drinking a urine-colored beverage, flushing a heart, and generally risking her entire career in a transgressive environmentalist psychological horror movie that’s also a Biblical allegory.

In the category of “Weirdest Actor,” the Award goes to Casey Affleck, for performing almost all of A Ghost Story under a sheet with eyeholes cut out.

And, completing a dominant showing that was almost the first clean sweep in Weirdcademy Award history, the award for Weirdest Movie of 2017 goes to mother!, the most divisive film of 2017.

Thanks to all members of the Weirdcademy, and see you again next year!

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Only forty-five more titles to Certify Weird.

Check back later today for the official unveiling of the winners of this year’s Weirdcademy Awards.

Here’s what’s on tap next week: Alfred Eaker‘s contribution will be a mystery, wrapped in a (?) enigma. G. Smalley goes to the movies to report on Annihilation (hint: you should see it while you can). El Rob Hubbard catches us up on 2017’s Satanic A Dark Song. And Giles Edwards braves the reader-suggested queue for ‘s obsessive, 3+ hour experimental mockumentary, The Falls.

The increasing use of privacy settings continues to impede our quest to bring you, the faithful reader, a list of the Weirdest Search Terms of the Week, but here’s what we saw. “girl gets dress bitten off by snake and says how expensive it was then gets eaten” probably describes a real movie; yet somehow, the query comes across as a little weird to us. A bit stranger is “want a penis long enough to pumpin a vagina .com”. Kind of sad, really, but it’s the addition of the “.com” that tips it from “pathetic” to “weird” for us.  For our official Weirdest Search Term of the Week, we will go with “spitting impalement from old horror movie (unknown)” (not sure what extra value the parenthesized “unknown” is supposed to add, but it does add extra oddness).

We’re moving Visitor of a Museum [Posetitel muzeya] into the out-of-print holding pen. With that adjustment, here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: The Falls (next week!); Darc Arc; Genius Party; The Idiots; The Shout; “Premium” (depending on availability);  Spermula; Killer Condom; The Godmonster of Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Remember, this week you’ll be voting for the Weirdest Movie, Actor, Actress, Scene and of 2017 in the 8th Annual Weirdcademy Awards. Your ballot is here, and the shorts program is available here.

Next week, Alfred Eaker continues his “spirituality” series with ‘s The Mirror. In honor of the upcoming Academy Awards we’ll look at the one movie worthy of weird notice: ‘s Cold War bestiality fantasy, The Shape of Water. Then, we’ll look at two items from the reader-suggested queue: the recent-ish British indie memory-recovery thingee Skeletons, and Japan’s silent Expressionist relic, 1926’s A Page of Madness.

We’ve complained before that the increasing use of privacy filters is destroying our weekly survey of Weirdest Search Terms of the Week, making it so only searches from poor countries where they can’t afford privacy get through. That’s why this week we’re reduced to featuring such searches as “movie kids brother died. his hero fighter named animal has shock collar on gets killed” in this column. (Yeah, that’s probably just a badly-phrased search for a real movie, but what are you gonna do?) Only slightly stranger is the search for “free pure black and white 1950s beastiality movie with shower scene.” Things are so bad that something like “sister show her pantis of her braxer erktik movi” can win our Weirdest Search Term of the Week contest purely due to atrocious spelling and grammar. Let’s turn those privacy filters off and do better next week, shall we, guys?

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Skeletons (next week!); A Page of Madness (next week!); Visitor of a Museum [Posetitel muzeya]; Darc Arc; Genius Party; The Idiots; The Shout; “Premium” (depending on availability); The Falls; Spermula; Killer Condom; The Godmonster of Indian Flats; I Am Here Now; Sir Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

YOUR VOTE DETERMINES THE WINNERS OF THE 8TH ANNUAL WEIRDCADEMY AWARDS

So Casey Affleck gets a Most Conventional Actor Oscar for mooning around New England looking like he got served a bad bowl of clam chowder, but when he does an entire movie with a sheet over his head with eyeholes cut out watching Rooney Mara eat a pie, he doesn’t even get a sniff from the Academy? Cast Jennifer Lawrence in any old romantic comedy as a quirky pixie who reinvigorates some dude’s shattered love life and they toss nominations at her sight unseen, but let her act in just one Biblical allegory where she gets her face stomped in by a bajillion rowdy houseguests, and suddenly she’s not good enough for a Most Conventional Actress award? So what retreads did the Academy of Arts and Sciences see fit to nominate for the Most Conventional Picture Oscar of 2017? This year’s movie about a white high school senior fretting about her future? This year’s Stephen Spielberg/Tom Hanks/Meryl Streep snoozer? This year’s historical reenactment society drama (two of them in 2017, and they chose the exact same subject)? This year’s gay romance movie? This year’s movie about a kidnapped Amazonian lizard man who has sex with a mute woman while on the run from Commie spies? (Actually, maybe they were awake for that one).

Yes, the Oscars are a joke, and everyone knows it. You, my friend, aren’t content with the same-old same-old, new wine in a familiar old glass. You want weird in your movies. The Weirdcademy Awards are for you, the moviegoer whose friends roll their eyes and sigh loudly when you suggest buying tickets to a Polish killer mermaid musical.

Although the editors of 366 Weird Movies select the nominees from the pool of available movies, the Awards themselves are a naked popularity contest and do not necessarily reflect either the artistic merit or intrinsic weirdness of the films involved. The Weirdcademy Awards are tongue-in-cheek and for fun only. Ballot-stuffing is a frequent occurrence. Please, no wagering.

The Weirdcademy Awards are given to the Weirdest Movie, Actor, Actress and Scene of the previous year, as voted by the members of the Weirdcademy of Motion Picture Arts and Weirdness.

Who makes up the Weirdcademy? Membership is open to all readers of 366 Weird Movies. The rules for joining the Weirdcademy of Motion Picture Arts and Weirdness are as follows. To officially join, locate an official online ballot (such as the one below) and hover your mouse pointer over the radial button representing the choice of movie you would like to see win any award in any category. Then, simply depress the left button of your mouse to make your selection. Selections made using the right mouse button will be disregarded, and you will be forced to reapply. If your application for membership is approved, a dot will appear next to your choice. You are not done yet, so continue reading. To be certified as a voting member of the Weirdcademy, at some point subsequent to making your selection, you must navigate your mouse button to the box marked “vote.” Now, again depress your left mouse button to confirm your membership as a voting member of the Weirdcademy.

(Vote as many times as you like, but only once per day, please. We’ll keep voting open until March 4 at 12:00 Noon EST, so we can announce our results before the Academy Awards and steal their thunder).

There is no requirement that you’ve have to actually see all the movies in any category before voting.

Be sure to also vote for Weirdest Short Film of the Year. To watch all five nominees and to cast your vote, please click here.

Without further delay, we unveil the nominees for the 2017 Weirdcademy Awards below:
Continue reading YOUR VOTE DETERMINES THE WINNERS OF THE 8TH ANNUAL WEIRDCADEMY AWARDS

VOTE FOR THE WEIRDEST SHORT FILM OF 2017

It’s time for the 2017 edition of the Weirdcademy Awards, the premier (only) awards contest focused on weird films, chosen by weird film fans. That means shorts as well as features. We’ve collected all five nominees for 2017′s Weirdest Short of the Year together in one place, for ease of voting. Just click “continued” for a mini film-festival of weirdness. Be sure to vote for your favorite! (You can cast a vote once every 24 hours). Polls close March 4 at 12:00 Noon EST. Cameron Jorgensen, 366 Weird Movies under-appreciated shorts Czar, discovered and selected these unusual films through his own research. This year’s lineup includes sinister panaceas, futuristic droughts, stop-motion rear nudity, lizard obsessions, and dogsitting nightmares. Click below to view all the nominees and vote.

Continue reading VOTE FOR THE WEIRDEST SHORT FILM OF 2017

WEIRD HORIZON FOR THE WEEK OF 2/23/2018

Our weekly look at what’s weird in theaters, on hot-off-the-presses DVDs and Blu-rays (and hot off the server VODs), and on more distant horizons…

Trailers of new release movies are generally available at the official site links.

IN THEATERS (WIDE RELEASE):

Annihilation (2018): A group of scientists investigate a paranormal phenomenon called “the Shimmer.” This highly-anticipated feature from Alex (Ex Machina) Garland is hard sci-fi with a final act that at least one critic found “intensely weird.” Annihilation official Facebook page.

IN THEATERS (LIMITED RELEASE):

November (2017): Read our List Candidate entry! The early forerunner for Weirdest Picture of 2018 gets its NYC debut, to be followed by screenings in major cities throughout the Spring. November official site.

We Are Not Cats (2018): An indie love story between trichophagiacs (people compelled to eat their own hair). Maybe more darkly quirky than weird, but it’s a queasy subject that hasn’t been explored before. We Are Not Cats official site.

NEW ON HOME VIDEO:

Mom and Dad (2017): Pitch black comedy wherein mass hysteria causes parents to hunt their own children; what makes it notable, however, is cranky director teaming up (again) with ever-hammy . Out on DVD, VOD and Blu-ray. Buy Mom and Dad.

The Night Walker (1964): Read Pamela De Graff’s review. ‘s surreal B-horror was never released on DVD, but Shout! Factory ships it straight to Blu-ray. Buy The Night Walker.

Underground (1995): A black market arms dealer locks his partner in an underground compound so he won’t figure out that the war is over. ‘s Palme D’or winning surreal satire hasn’t been easy to find recently, but Kino Lorber unleashes a lavish set which includes the expanded television version (six episodes, each about an hour long). It comes in either three DVD or one Blu-ray, two DVD flavors. Buy Underground.

NEW EXCLUSIVELY ON NETFLIX:

On Body and Soul [Teströl és lélekröl] (2017): Two slaughterhouse workers find that they share a common dream (literally—they each have the exact same dream night after night). We’re not fond of Netflix exclusive releases for smaller foreign films—treasures like Skins can get buried and lost—but it is better than the movie sitting on a distributor’s shelf forever.

CERTIFIED WEIRD (AND OTHER) REPERTORY SCREENINGS:

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975). We won’t list all the screenings of this audience-participation classic separately. You can use this page to find a screening near you.

FREE MOVIES ON TUBI.TV:

Akira (1988): Read the Certified Weird entry! If Neo-Tokyo’s all-time cult anime has somehow evaded you, here’s your chance. Watch out for the motorcycle clowns! Watch Akira free on Tubi.tv.

What are you looking forward to? If you have any weird movie leads that I have overlooked, feel free to leave them in the COMMENTS section.

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

Only 47 movies left to Certify Weird…

Next week Alfred Eaker continues his unofficial spiritual movie quest by meditating on Andrei Rublev, ‘s early, controversial (in the Soviet Union) biography of the titular icon painter. Next up, Giles Edwards dives into the reader-suggested queue for a look at ‘s gory 1987 debut, Bad Taste. Giles will also take a second look at ‘s shroomy historical saga A Field in England, while G. Smalley looks at the chilly new Estonian fairy tale fantasy November (briefly mentioned by the aforementioned Giles in his 2017 Fantasia Festival coverage). We’re filling in holes and patching up oversights as we continue to build to the magical 366.

This week’s weirdest search terms come with an alien theme. The least strange of these is the search for “hungarian alien porn,” a genre we did not realize Hungarians specialized in. A bit stranger in “alien stealing white blood”; who knew there were alien KKK sympathizers? Our official Weirdest Search Term of the Week, “dial are sick also monkey movie since our own a sitter,” stretches the theme to its breaking point. We contend that only an alien completely unfamiliar with Earth movies could have submitted such an outlandish and incoherent request. Or perhaps a monkey.

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Bad Taste (next week!); Visitor of a Museum [Posetitel muzeya]; Darc Arc; Genius Party; The Idiots; The Shout; “Premium” (depending on availability); The Falls; Spermula; Killer Condom; The Godmonster of Indian Flats; I Am Here Now; Sir Henry at Rawlinson End; Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

WEIRD HORIZON FOR THE WEEK OF 2/16/2018

Our weekly look at what’s weird in theaters, on hot-off-the-presses DVDs and Blu-rays (and hot off the server VODs), and on more distant horizons…

Trailers of new release movies are generally available at the official site links.

IN THEATERS (LIMITED RELEASE):

Double Lover [L’Amant Double] (2017): A woman falls in love with her psychoanalyst and discovers he has a secret. Writer/director has always threatened to go full weird; maybe this is the time he makes it? Double Lover U.S. distributor site.

NEW ON HOME VIDEO:

Drag Me to Hell (2009): Read our review. Shout! Factory celebrates ‘s brief return to horror with this elaborate two-Blu set that includes an unrated cut of the flick. Buy Drag Me to Hell [Collector’s Edition Blu-ray].

Night of the Living Dead (1968): Read Alfred Eaker’s mini-review. Not so weird, but we thought you’d like to know: the got their hands on this film everyone has already seen, livening it up for Deadheads by exhuming a horde of special features, including never-before-seen workprints and dailies. On DVD and Blu-ray. Buy Night of the Living Dead [Criterion Collection].

Orchestra Rehearsal (1978): An orchestra rehearsal degenerates into squabbling and chaos. Rare , a fake documentary made for Italian television featuring Nino Rota’s final score for the director, now on Blu-ray and video-on-demand courtesy of Arrow Academy. Buy Orchestra Rehearsal.

CERTIFIED WEIRD (AND OTHER) REPERTORY SCREENINGS:

The Rocky Horror Picture Show (1975). We won’t list all the screenings of this audience-participation classic separately. You can use this page to find a screening near you.

FREE MOVIES ON TUBI.TV:

Stroszek (1977): Read Giles Edwards review. Stick with ‘s quirky drama (featuring many amateur actors) about a drunk street musician, his elderly landlord, and a prostitute who move from Berlin to Wisconsin looking for a better life—it builds to a pretty good dancing chicken. Watch Stroszek on Tubi.tv.

What are you looking forward to? If you have any weird movie leads that I have overlooked, feel free to leave them in the COMMENTS section.

WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE

As of this week, there are only 48 Weird Movies left to Certify.

We’ll start next week’s journey as Alfred Eaker continued his sidebar on legitimately spiritual films with Robert Bresson’s 1951 drama Diary of a Country Priest. Shane Wilson follows up with an arguably spiritual film (though from an atheist): ‘s experimental deathbed confession, Blue (1993). Then Giles Edwards will tackle the last year’s less spiritual, but probably weirder, Australian micro-budget black comedy Hitler Lives!, before we end the week with a second look at the Little-Red-Riding-Hood-meets-TheHowling horror, The Company of Wolves (1984).

The movies above (at least some of them) are weird, but what about the dubious films we saw asked about in search queries, queries that we will now feature in our Weirdest Search Term of the Week contest? For example, someone was looking for a “movie eels in stomach long life raped daughter.” Equally strange is the possibility that “a beast eat human organ and swing them and hang on wall movie” exists. We decided the weirdest search was for “list of 80s movie natives compiet with giant egg on there head race with subtitles,” because the searcher thinks that movies about natives racing with giant eggs on their heads is an entire subgenre of films (and wants to see only the subtitled ones, thank you very much).

Here’s how the ridiculously-long reader-suggested review queue now stands: Blue (next week!); Bad Taste; Visitor of a Museum [Posetitel muzeya]; Darc Arc; Genius Party; The Idiots; The Shout; “Premium” Continue reading WHAT’S IN THE PIPELINE